Goodnight Kiss
by for you to notice
Summary: Summer was always confused when it came to Seth Cohen. He never really made sense to her. Even when they were only thirteen. Some harsh language. Read and review.
1. Default Chapter

_Note: None of it's mine. Peace and love..._

Seth Cohen was never a kid you looked twice at. He always seemed to be walking into doors or tables and always had to tug on his jeans to keep them from falling around his ankles. Because he was the kid that you always knew what color of boxers he was wearing. And even though she shouldn't have been looking, and she felt scandalous doing so, Summer Roberts was the kind of girl that always knew what brand they were.

"Summer. Summer. Summer. _Summer_."

"What?"

"Hi? Remember me? Holly? I live in the land of the living."

"Yeah, right. So?"

"Join me in the land of the living. Or the awake I guess. What were you _doing_ last night?"

"Uh, sleeping?"

"Omigod, who are we looking at?"

"What?"

"Who is it?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"If you're not tired, you must be staring at someone."

"Nope. No one. Sorry."

Summer picked up all her books and walked out of the room, not taking another look at Seth Cohen, but noticing that he took a look at her. Holly squealed and ran after her.

"Summer!"

He sighed as another cheer leader chased her out of the room. Summer had to be different. She dressed differently and you never saw her turning cartwheels in gym class like the showoffs she hung out with. And she wore a lot of eyeliner. That meant she was different. She didn't always wear white or pink. That meant she was different.

Seth had been different his whole life, so he had always been more comfortable with it. He liked to tell himself that Summer wanted to be different, but she was afraid to break the mold she had built herself after all those years of wearing only pink or white.

"Hey Sum."

Marissa sauntered down the hall, Luke's arm protectively around her skinny waist. Summer grinned.

"Hey, Coop. Listen, can I talk to you for a sec?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Alone?" Summer glanced back at Luke and Holly. Holly looked away and pretended not to care.

"Yeah, okay. I'll see you later, okay, Luke?"

Summer and Marissa had been best friends since they were in the third grade. Surprisingly, four years later, nothing had changed. They shared all their secrets with each other, and so when Holly had tried to butt in when they were in fifth grade because Marissa had kissed Luke on the back of the bus, it was awkward. And Holly was always shunted to the outside. And she always was a little hurt by it. Summer didn't really care; she had never loved the idea of Holly.

"Hey, Sum, what's up?"

"Can I spend the night at your house tonight? The step mother is having some sort of gathering of noops."

"Uh, yeah, sure, I think."

"Okay, thanks, Coop. You're a life saver."

"No problem. I have to baby-sit Kaitlyn though, so...I mean, you can help me if you want."

"Yeah sure. She's cool."

Marissa snorted.

"She's a little bitch. I mean, lately, she's been all clingy, like, she wants to do whatever I do. And I mean, sometimes I don't want her there."

"I dunno, it's cool to have a little sister, right?"

"Sometimes. But she's just a little scammer. It's always my fault. And she has to report everything to my mother. Like when I said I wanted to go on a diet. She went all to the mother saying I was anorexic. And I was, like, nooo. But what I say is always wrong and what she says is right."

Summer swallowed her next thought because she didn't think Marissa would take it very well if she told her that she _had_ been anorexic. And it had been Summer that told Julie and not Kaitlyn.

"I'll watch her then. You can watch t.v. then I'll come and hang out with you."

"Really? No, Sum, that's okay. Don't worry about it."

"No, I like Kaitlyn. She's always been nice to me."

"No, we'll do it together."

"Okay, that'll be cool. So I'll be over at, like...half past six?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Thanks, Coop."

Summer gave her a half armed hug and grinned.

"Class, then."

"Right. Love you."

"Love you too."

Summer had fit in with the 'popular' kids when she had started filling out the year before. The highest of the popular guys had been looking at her during biology. He wore a grin like he practiced in the mirror. And he had asked her out. They had been boyfriend/girlfriend for a week when he decided he liked some other girl better. But the people he had had her hang out with hadn't forgotten her. So she had her rank. And she always had a seat in new classes.

Ready with 10 Things I Hate About You and a package of M&Ms, Summer knocked on the Coopers' door. She didn't hear anything. The lights were on, so someone had to be home, but no one thought they could let in the freezing girl in a pair of shorts during February.

"Come on, Coop."

She tried the doorknob and was surprised to find it open. She slid into the house, left her materials on the table and headed upstairs to find Marissa.

"Coop? Coop."

She walked down the hall to Marissa's room and pushed open the cracked door.

"Marissa, I don't know why you have to be so difficult. I'm not accusing you of anything. I just mean, you're gorgeous and I don't want you to hurt yourself."

"Mom, you don't know anything. You assume things just because I'm thinner than you are."

Summer's eyes darted to Julie Cooper's face, whose eyes darted down to her waist that Summer had always thought was perfect.

"Your father and I will be home at around 11."

"Fine by me."

Mrs. Cooper's eyes narrowed but she left without touching Marissa, or even looking at her again. She nodded toward Summer and pushed out of the room. Summer turned to Marissa who shook her head.

"Sorry about that. She can be so stupid."

"No, it's-it's okay."

"All right. You bring a movie?"

"Uh, yeah. Heath Ledger and Julia Stiles."

"Awesome. We just need to send Kaitlyn to bed."

"She can stay with us if..."

"No, she can't."

"MaRISSA!"

She rolled her eyes and shouted back.

"What?"

"I don't want to go to bed, I'm nine years old and it's only 7!"

"Well, you're going to bed anyway. Sorry."

"Liar!"

"So what if I am? Bitch."

Summer tried not to hear, but Kaitlyn flew into the room, daggers in her eyes.

"I don't _want_ to go to bed and you can't make me."

"Oh yes I can."

"No you can't. And I left Curtis at the Cohens' and I can't sleep without him."

Marissa rolled her eyes but her voice calmed down. "Summer will take you. Do you mind?"

"No, no, sure. Whatever."

"All right. _Then_ you're going to bed."

"Fine. Or maybe I'll just stay with Seth."

"Fine with me."

"Fine."

"Summer, will you walk her over? God knows I'd _hate_ it if she was kidnapped on the way over."

"They're next door, right?"

"Yeah. Thanks."

"No problem. Come on, Kaitlyn."

Kaitlyn took Summer's hand and flipped Marissa off with her other one. Marissa stuck her finger up right back and stuck out her tongue. Summer walked faster.

Once they got out of the house, Kaitlyn let go of Summer's hand and sighed. Summer turned to Kaitlyn; she was always entranced by her.

"So who's Curtis?"

"Oh, just my stuffed animal."

"Oh. That's cool."

"Yeah."

"So you hang out with Seth a lot?"

"Yeah, I guess. He's actually nice unlike" sigh. "_some_ people."

"Marissa is nice. She just...she's sensitive."

"And stupid."

"So are all people."

"Seth talks about you a lot."

"Really?"

"Yeah. He says you're really pretty and nice to people. I think he's right."

She grinned up at Summer and Summer grinned back. She still didn't know why Seth Cohen was talking about her to nine year olds. But it wasn't a long walk, and they were already there. Kaitlyn knocked on the big door and it opened almost instantly. Kirsten Cohen, the woman Lara, Summer's dad's new girlfriend, always talked about with a complete snide tone, opened it. She smiled. She had a really warm smile.

"Kaitlyn, it's so good to see you again."

"You too, Mrs. Cohen. Is Seth home?"

"Yeah, he's in his room. Who's your beautiful friend?"

Summer blushed and Kaitlyn giggled.

"This is _Summer_. Marissa's best friend."

She said it with so much gusto that Summer blushed harder. Kirsten nodded and without any further embarrassment smiled at Summer and extended her hand.

"It's nice to meet you. I'm Kirsten."

"Hi."

"Would you like to come in for a minute? Fresh cookies. Well, I mean, I didn't make them, but Rosa says they're really good."

Summer grinned farther, shot a look at the Coopers' house, but nodded.

"Yeah, sure. That'd be cool."

"Cool. Come in."

She moved aside and the two girls shuffled in. Kirsten's smile seemed to broaden as she led them into the kitchen.

"I can't tell you how great it is to have some females in this house. Boys are fun, but they don't know anything a lot of the time."

Summer smiled again and nodded. Kirsten pointed to the table and Summer sat next to Kaitlyn who popped up as soon as she sat down grinning at the teenage boy that had just came down the stairs.

"Seth!"

"Oh, hey, Kaitlyn. Marissa being mean again?"

"Yeah, she's trying to make me go to bed."

"It's only 7."

"That's what _I_ said. But apparently I'm not cool enough to hang out with them."

"Them?"

"Oh, yeah, Marissa and, uh, _Summer_."

"Oh."

Summer turned her head and let her eyes rest on his reddening cheeks. She flashed a smile and waved her fingers.

"Hi. You're in my English class, right?"

"Uh...yeah. Hey. So, uh, Kaitlyn, um, I, uh, got this new video game thing if you want to, you know, check it out."

"Yeah sure! Bye, Summer, I'll call you when I want to come home."

"Okay. Bye Kaitlyn. Bye Seth."

He muttered something but walked out of the room without looking at her. Kaitlyn tried to hide a giggle, said bye, and followed him out of the room. Summer spun her legs back around and sat across from Kirsten. She glanced down at the three cookies on her plate, glanced at her own stomach thinking about how Marissa was thinner than her too, but picked up the cookie and nibbled on the edge.

"Milk?"

"Uh, no thanks."

Kirsten grabbed a cookie herself and ate it in two seconds. Kirsten was thinner than Mrs. Cooper, but not nearly as thin as Marissa. Summer thought she was gorgeous.

"So, my son seems to have a really, really big crush on you, huh?"

Summer blushed deeper and laughed. She had never talked to an adult like this. Kirsten Nichol, Cohen, was joking with her about boys.

"I dunno, I mean I don't know him that well anymore."

"But you nearly made his face blow up there for a second. But why shouldn't you? You're a gorgeous young lady."

Summer decided she liked Kirsten Cohen.

"Thank you."

"Yeah, sure." She blew it away as if she had just said they had just had a beautiful day of sun. "You're friends with Marissa?"

"Best friends. For four years."

"Wow. You're pretty lucky."

She nodded. Kirsten smiled fondly at her. Almost like a moth-but she wasn't.

"I should, um, go now. Coop-Marissa's waiting for me."

"You didn't eat. Aren't you hungry?"

"Um, no. I had a big dinner."

"It's 7. You're not like one of those ridiculous girls who think they're fat, are you?"

"No, uh..." Summer popped the cookie into her mouth and grinned. "Thanks." She said it thickly with a mouth full of chocolate that made Kirsten laugh.

"Come back sometime. I like you."

She nodded and smiled as she walked out of the kitchen.

"Bye Summer."

She pulled her head over her shoulder and waved. Before leaving though, she ran into the bathroom next to the front door and spit the chocolatey mess into the toilet. She didn't need it. She coughed for a minute and filled her hands with water from the sink. She sipped it up and checked her hair. She flushed the toilet and turned to leave. The bathroom door was still open and Seth was watching her from the bottom of the stairs. She tried to leave without talking to him but he called out to her.

"You're not fat, you know."

She spun around, her hair flying into her lip gloss and she studied his face. His braces had been reattached to his teeth and it made his mouth look crowded.

"What makes you think I think I'm fat?"

"You can eat a cookie."

"I know."

"And you don't have to throw it up afterwards."

"You don't know what you're talking about."

"It's not good for you."

"No shit."

He fingered his belt loops and shook his head.

"I was just saying. You shouldn't do that to yourself. You're fine just the way you are."

"Maybe sometimes I want to be more than fine."

"Maybe you are."

His face had calmed down, and he was looking at her without the fear he had in his eyes before. She shook her head.

"I'm not."

"I think you are."

She bit her lip and looked up at him. He had grown a few inches too. He was almost as tall as Mr. Cooper now.

"Um, thanks, I guess."

"I think you're beautiful."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"Oh."

She looked at the door and she looked at him. She jogged over to the stairs, gave him a quick kiss on the cheek, smiled, and went out the door. He touched the place where she had kissed him lightly and stared at his fingers. He must've been dreaming.

_"I hate the way you talk to me and the way you cut your hair. I hate the way you drive my car, I hate it when you stare. I hate your big, dumb combat boots, and the way you read my mind. I hate you so much it makes me sick, it even makes me rhyme. I hate the way you're always right; I hate it when you lie. I hate it when you make me laugh, even worse when you make me cry. I hate it when you're not around, and the fact that you didn't call. But mostly, I hate the way I don't hate you, not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all."_

Summer and Marissa awed, both of them with tears in their eyes, as Julia Stiles started choking out the last few words, her eyes on Heath Ledger the whole time. They sighed and the phone rang. Marissa jumped up and picked it up.

"Hello? Oh, hey. Yeah. You sure? Okay. All right."

She hung up the phone and paused the movie.

"Would you mind picking up Kaitlyn? She says she wants to come home."

"Oh. Sure."

Summer hopped up, checked out her outfit, and messed up her hair enough to make her not seem to care.

She walked over to the Cohens' and knocked on the door. It was opened by a man this time with shockingly large eyebrows.

"Hi, I'm Summer. I'm here for Kaitlyn."

"Oh, right. Come in."

She stepped inside the house and looked at it for the second time. She knew the Cohens were rich, but this was enormous. The chandelier perched at the top of the ceiling sparkled and send prisms of light around the room.

"Wow."

"Yeah, you gotta love my wife."

"Yeah."

"You're Summer Roberts, right? Your dad's Neil Roberts?"

"Uh, yeah."

"Right. You want to go get her? She's in Seth's room. That's third on your left."

"Oh, um, yeah, sure."

She was going to go into his _room_? Like, his bedroom? God. She walked up the stairs, trying to not make a big deal of it and found the doorknob. She pulled her hand away and knocked.

"It's open."

She pushed into the room, seeing Seth and Kaitlyn on the floor pulling out strips of wood from a tower. Seth was focusing so hard that his tongue was peeking through his lips. He pulled out the wood and the whole thing fell down. Kaitlyn giggled.

"Ha! You lose; I win."

"You win. My attempts were thwarted again by the super cool nine year old."

He was laughing too and looked up and saw Summer staring at him. His cheeks started heating up. Kaitlyn followed his gaze and saw Summer too. She smiled.

"Hey. You guys watching a movie?"

"Yeah, but it's almost over."

"Oh. Okay. Bye Seth."

She wrapped her arms around his neck and he patted her arm.

"Bye kid. Come back, okay?"

"Mm-hmm."

He looked back at Summer and grinned sheepishly. She grinned back.

"Bye Cohen."

"Bye 'Roberts.'"

She bit her tongue again and left. He was so sweet and funny and nice and he was actually starting to get cute. But he was Seth Cohen. Lana would probably like him; he was a Nichol after all. Summer shivered; the fact that she even thought anything like that made her feel shallow. And she wasn't shallow.

"Summer?"

"Hmm?"

Kaitlyn's face was screwed up in concentration, obviously trying to figure out a way to say what she wanted to.

"Can I ask you something? Really weird?"

"Yeah, sure."

"And you'll answer honestly?"

"Of course."

Kaitlyn looked around her shoulders, and smiled at Mr. Cohen as they walked out. As soon as the door was closed she opened her mouth again.

"Have you ever liked someone but, uh, they really liked someone else?"

Summer looked at her out of the corner of her eye and slowly nodded her head.

"Why?"

It wasn't true. It couldn't be.

"And that person...I mean, it's impossible that they liked you back, but you kept...I dunno, picturing it."

"Kaitlyn?"

"Not that I like anyone. I mean, I don't. I mean..."

"Seth?"

Kaitlyn's eyes dilated to twice their size.

"Uh...uh...I mean...no?"

"Kaitlyn, it's okay. It's natural for you to like someone older because all the boys your age don't seem like men."

"You like older people too?"

"Sometimes."

"Oh. Well...don't tell my mom."

"I wouldn't."

"Okay. That's what I thought, I just...wanted to...make sure."

"Yeah, no problem."

"He's just so...nice to me, you know? And when I talk to him I know he's listening. And I dunno...he's got a cute butt too."

Summer laughed and brushed her hair out of her lip gloss again. She nodded and grinned.

"I can understand."

"But he likes you. He really, really likes you and I mean, I'm four years younger than he is. He'd never like me back."

"Well, I mean, you never know about the future, right? When you're sixteen, he'll only be twenty."

"Yeah. But I still wish I could go out with him _now_."

"Yeah, well, good things come to those who wait."

"Mmm. Summer, can you promise me something?"

"Uh, depends on what it is."

"Could you promise that you wouldn't...go out with him first?"

"What?"

"Because, I mean, I know if he went out with you he'd never want to go out with someone like me."

"That's not true."

"But you don't like him, right? So you're not promising much."

"I don't want to...promise something like that, though, Kaitlyn. I'm sorry. I mean, I don't know what will happen. Whatever happens happens."

"Why? You don't like him. Why can't you just do something to make me happy?"

"Kaitlyn! God, don't get so worked up. You're probably never even going to go out with him."

She scrunched up her nose and turned away from Summer. Summer sighed.

"Kaitlyn, come on. You don't have anything to really get mad about."

She didn't turn around. Summer rolled her eyes.

"Fine. Whatever. Be that way."

Summer crossed her arms and they were about to walk up the Coopers' driveway when she heard her name. She spun around to see Seth running up to her, out of breath. Kaitlyn's eyes widened and seemed to get wet. Summer's heart fell. Seth had a stuffed dog in his hand.

"Oh, hey, Kaitlyn, you forgot this."

"Oh. Thanks."

"No problem."

"Okay."

All three of them stood, rocking on their feet, daring each other to say something. Seth's head fell to his chest and Summer started twirling a strand of hair around her finger.

"Um, Kaitlyn, it's late. You should be in-in bed."

"No, it's okay. Marissa's waiting for you; you should probably go in."

"Summer's right, Kaitlyn. I'll see you tomorrow okay?"

"But-but..."

"He'll see you _tomorrow_, Kaitlyn."

Kaitlyn scowled at Summer and rolled her eyes, trying to look cool.

"Whatev."

She pushed past Summer's shoulder, pushing him back a little bit on her way up to the house. Summer leaned against the wall.

"Is something wrong with her?"

Seth raised his eyebrows and Summer shook her head.

"It's so stupid."

"Try me."

"I probably shouldn't tell you, but...she kind of...has this little...crush on you."

"Oh. Really? She does?"

"Yeah. And I dunno, she's a little upset because I told her it probably wouldn't ever happen."

"What? Me and her?"

"Yeah."

"Oh. Why'd you say that?"

"Because I didn't want her to have false hope."

"Oh. That's it?"

"Well, yeah. I think."

"You think."

"Yeah, I mean, what else could it be?"

She raised her eyebrows too and he laughed. She liked how he laughed.

"I dunno, maybe, _unconsciously_, you want it to be like that because...really you want to go out with me."

"I do?"

"Unconsciously, you think I'm adorable."

He raised his eyebrows higher and she started laughing harder.

"Don't push your luck, Cohen."

"I'm just saying. There's a chance."

"It's not very big, is it?"

"Well, not large, but it's still a chance."

"Mm-hmm. Maybe you should keep dreaming."

"How did you know?"

She laughed again. He grinned; she laughed well.

"Well, Cohen, if I ever do decide I want to go out with you, I'll let you know."

"All right, that's all I'm asking."

"All right, Cohen."

He grinned farther and she laughed. He was kind of, in a way, cute. That's when Kaitlyn decided to come back out.

"_Su_mmer. Marissa wants to see you."

"Fine. I'm coming."

"No you're not."

"I'm almost coming."

"She hasn't eaten anything."

"She'll eat."

"You should go make her."

"She'll eat."

"Why doesn't she eat?" Seth bunched up his eyebrows and Summer shook her head.

"It's stupid. She'll get over it."

"She's already so skinny."

"Yeah, I know."

Kaitlyn rolled her eyes so hard they looked like they were going to fall out of her head. "She's just stupid."

"Hey, she's not stupid."

"Yes she is. It's what Seth and I were talking about tonight."

"So you think she's _stupid_?" Summer's eyes flashed to Seth's and he stepped back.

"I didn't say she was _stupid_ per say. I just..."

"You just nothing. You don't call great people like her anything like stupid. That's retarded."

"Isn't that self contradictory?"

"I can't believe you would...say something like that and then _hit_ on me."

"Who said I was hitting on you? You were flirting with _me_."

"Omigod, ew. I wouldn't. I have to go see Coop. Jackass."

"Summer, wait..."

"Let her go, Seth. She doesn't really like you." Kaitlyn glared at Summer again who glared back. Seth stepped forward.

"Hey! Who asked you?"

Kaitlyn looked like she was going to cry. Seth realized his mistake and tried to take it back.

"Kaitlyn, I mean..."

"I don't care what you mean. I'm never talking to you again, Seth Cohen! You never treated me like I was a little kid. Not until now."

"Kaitlyn, aren't you being a little dramatic."

"_No_, I'm _not_!"

She pushed away into the house behind Summer. Seth groaned and made his way back to his house. It hadn't been a good night.

_Please let me know what you think. I'm still not sure if I want to leave this as one part or a full story._


	2. Just Don't Ask Me How I Am

_ Okay, I think I like this story so I spent my first full day of summer vacation writing another chapter. I think it was influenced a little bit by emrie's Chambers of the Sea, so some credit should go to her. There's some language in this one, but I don't believe in censorship because of it. So just be aware of that. Please let me know what you think too. _  
  


"Summer."

"Yeah?"

"What _is _your problem? You won't even _look_ at me."

"Oh. Sorry. What did you want?"

"Never mind. What has gotten into you?"

"Nothing! I'm fine."

"It's a guy."

"What?"

"It's a guy. Who is he? Do I know him?"

"Holly, just...leave me alone, okay?"

Summer pulled her books up into her arms and walked out of the classroom. She shook off the grins people passed her and pushed anyone aside in the way of her locker. Stupid Greg was standing in front of it.

"Hey Roberts."

"Greg...not today."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Could you...move?"

"Summer, what's..."

"Nothing. Move."

He slid aside and she pulled off her lock and tried to push up the lever to get the damned thing open. It pushed up easily, but bounced back just as easily without showing any sign of opening.

"Open."

She kicked it once and tried pulling the lever again. Nothing.

"Goddammit, open!"

She kicked it harder, but it still didn't budge. She stuck her fingers inside the crack that was her boundary from all of her things inside and pulled as she shoved up the lever. Greg opened his mouth to offer help, but she shook her head.

"Open, you piece of _shit_! What the hell is your problem? I didn't do anything wrong! I did what I was supposed to and you still won't fucking open! _What_ _the hell_?"

She kicked it repeatedly while Greg grabbed her waist and pulled her away from the locker.

"Summer! Summer! Stop!"

"_Goddammit_!"

"Summer."

Marissa slipped through the crowd that was gathering around the girl that was barely a millimeter over 5'2", maybe around 110 pounds, but knives sharpening in her eyes.

"Summer."

She spun her head to look at her best friend and let two tears fall before falling into her. Dr. Rachel Chapman came running in, trying to break apart the kids to get to Summer.

"Children, I am the principal, could you...Ms. Roberts, what's wrong?"

Marissa shook her head, but the tall woman shook her head back.

"Miss Cooper, I am your authority. You don't get to tell me what to..."

Summer pulled her face up from Marissa's shirt and wiped her eyes quickly.

"Nothing's wrong, Ms. Chapman. I'm fine."

"Miss Roberts..."

"Fine. I was just...frustrated...with my...locker."

"All the same, Miss Roberts..."

"I'm fine."

"Maybe you should get an excuse from your next class and you could speak to me..."

"It's fine, Ms. Chapman. Thank you, though."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"All right. Back to class, everyone."

Summer pushed away her tears again and Marissa bent her head down to look at her.

"Summer? What's wrong?"

"It's just...he's getting another...divorce. You remember Lara? Yeah, she's better than Tracy apparently, so...yeah. There goes another one."

"Oh, your dad?"

"Yeah."

"You okay?"

"It's just...if he can't be happy with any of them, can't he just have me instead? Give up on the girlfriends and have...you know, a daughter."

"Summer, that's not it. He loves you. You know that."

"Yeah. Okay. I should...get to class."

"Summer, you want to...come to my house tonight?"

"Um, yeah. Um...yeah, thank you."

"All right? Okay, I'll see you."

"Mm-hmm."

"Bye. Love you."

"Right. L-Love you too."

Marissa smiled weakly at her and Summer tried to return it, but gave up and just walked away. Marissa bit her lip but walked away. She didn't get what Summer was going through and she knew it.

Summer made her way into the Coopers' house but stopped when she saw Julie lounging on the front porch, reading a book.

"Hi Mrs. Cooper."

"Summer. Hi. Are you here for Marissa?"

"Uh, yeah."

"Well, she's at ballet class but she'll be back soon."

"Oh. Okay, is it all right if I wait?"

"Sure. Kaitlyn's inside or...I mean, if you want to, you can stay out here with me."

"Okay, thanks Mrs. Cooper."

She waved her hand and shook her head. "It's nothing."

"Okay."

Summer sat down in the chair next to the woman who she thankfully saw more than her father's fiancée. They sat in silence, Summer watching the people walk by in their matching sweaters and designer jeans. She looked away to Mrs. Cooper. Her hair had gone a bolder red from the dramatic brown, and brief period of very blonde, that Summer had gotten used to. Her cheeks were higher and seemed more relaxed from what she had remembered. But she was still gorgeous.

"Mrs. Cooper? Where did you grow up?"

Julie's eyes flew to Summer; she could see it through the dark shades.

"Why?"

"Just wondering."

"Somewhere far from here, I'm afraid. It's so much better hear, honey, believe me."

"Oh. Do you still...you know, keep in touch with your parents?"

"Not really, honey. They're people that don't really match with people like me."

"Oh. I see. But were your parents...happy with each other?"

"Um, I think so. They weren't completely obsessed with each other but they did love each other."

"That's good, then. So you had a good childhood?"

"Not really 'good' but not that bad."

"That's nice."

"Is something wrong?"

"It's just my dad. He can't find how to be happy, you know?"

"Yeah. He's not satisfied."

"I guess. And I just...I just wish he could see that...I mean, I'm here for-for him if he wanted me. But, I guess he doesn't, right?"

"That's not necessarily true. Maybe he wants something right for you. And everything he finds isn't right."

"But if he doesn't give me a chance to know them, then how can he know that they're not right for me?"

"I dunno, honey. Maybe he's just confused."

"Yeah. I guess. I just wish he'd figure it out so I could too."

"Don't we all?"

Kaitlyn flounced out and sighed.

"Mommy, can I have a pony?"

"What?"

"I want a pony."

"A pony? Really, honey?"

"Yeah. I like horses."

"Sweetie...how about riding lessons instead?"

"But I want a pony."

"Well if you get riding lessons, you can get used to being around horses."

"And _then_ you'll get me a pony?"

"We'll see, honey."

"Okay. Thank you, Mommy."

Kaitlyn shot a look at Summer, who pretended she didn't notice, before leaving. Julie sighed.

"She's gotten so...stubborn lately. Like whatever she wants, she gets, and there shouldn't be any question about it. I don't know what's gotten into her."

"Yeah."

Summer bit her lip and didn't look at her. Julie didn't notice, but pulled her sunglasses off her eyes, glanced at her watch, and stood up.

"Marissa should be just about done. Would you like to come for the ride?"

"Um..." Summer looked past Mrs. Cooper and saw a teenage boy dragging a bag of garbage to the bottom of his driveway. He popped his skateboard up and was about to ride back up when he saw her. She looked away as quickly as she could. "Yeah, Mrs. Cooper. That'd be cool."

Summer stood up and followed Julie to the car. She peeked over her shoulder and saw him disappearing into his house. He didn't even care about her anymore. She wasn't anything but a memory to him. She had to try to forget him too.

Marissa was waiting outside, checking her watch every now and then and letting out a dramatic sigh. She saw Julie pulling up and stood up immediately. She swung her bag around the car and pulled open the passenger's door. She jumped in and opened the window.

"How was practice, honey?"

"Fine."

Marissa glanced around the head rest and saw Summer. She grinned.

"Hey, what're you doing here?"

"I got to your house early."

"Oh. Okay. What did you do? Isn't Kaitlyn still ready to tear your head off?"

"Yeah, she is. I hung out with your mom."

Marissa looked at her mother for a minute but looked away.

"That must've been...fun."

Julie shot a quick look at her but turned away. Marissa rolled her eyes at Summer, who tried to agree. But she didn't get why Marissa was complaining because this woman cared about her. It didn't make sense at all.

It was late when they finally got back to the Coopers'; Julie had decided ice cream was the way to go even though it could ruin their dinners. Summer turned it down, glancing back at her waist, but ended up eating almost all of Marissa's. So they got back at 7-ish and Marissa pulled Summer up to her room right away. The phone Julie had bought her the week before rang. Marissa picked it up and a smile went directly to her face.

"Hi you. Yeah, I think so." She giggled. Summer rolled her eyes. She got sick of Luke really fast. She tapped Marissa's shoulder.

"Hey Coop? I think I'm going to go for a walk."

Marissa nodded and kicked her feet up onto her bed. Summer left after grabbing Marissa's walkman.

"My name is Luka. I live on the second floor. I live upstairs from you. Yes I think you've seen me before."

She had her hands shoved into the thin jacket wrapped around her shoulders and Suzanne Vega crooning in her ear. It never got cold in California. It was always a perfect temperature. Summer shivered anyway.

"I think I'm kind of clumsy. I try not to talk too loud. Maybe I'm a little crazy. I try not to act too proud."

"You have a really good voice."

She spun around to see that damn Seth Cohen walking behind her.

"What, are you stalking me now?"

"Nope."

He pushed by her on his skateboard. She rolled her eyes.

"Then what are the chances you walk right behind me?"

"What are the chances that you are walking at 7:15 on a Thursday?"

"What's at 7:15 on Thursdays?"

"I get to see my lovely grandfather."

"Every Thursday?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Oh."

"Oh."

"Where does he live? Far?"

"Not far. About three miles."

"You go for three miles on a piece of wood?"

"Every Thursday."

"Don't you get tired of it?"

"Don't you get tired of ignoring me?"

"I'm not ignoring you."

"Oh really?"

"Really."

"So if I asked you if you paid me any thought at all since...two weeks ago, you'd say...no?"

"Sure."

"Really?"

"Mm-hmm."

"I don't believe you, beautiful."

"Since when did you get so cocky?"

"Cocky? No, _I_, Summer Roberts, was never cocky. Some years of shut downs by water polo players taught me to not be cocky."

"But when I first saw you, you were afraid to even talk to me."

"Yeah, well, I feel that once you call me a jackass, we have made a bond."

"You don't know what you're talking about."

"So what if I don't? I didn't do anything wrong in the first place."

"Except call my best friend stupid."

"That I did not completely do. Isn't it possible that young Kaitlyn could've been confused?"

"It's possible, but I believe her."

"You do? Okay. Well, I have to go anyway. Hate to be late for the 'most powerful man in Newport Beach.'"

"Who taught you to say that?"

"My dad. Although, I think he possibly uses it with a touch of sarcasm."

"A touch?"

"More than that. More like a dollop."

"Mm-hmm."

"But I really have to go. So you'll have to find your way back without me."

"I'll survive."

"That's good. Good luck, beautiful."

He pushed on ahead and soon was out of sight. Summer sighed and pulled her hands out of her pocket and into her belt loop. She checked her watch. 7:30. She had to go back.

Marissa was still on the phone with Luke; Kaitlyn was still in her room; Julie was still reading. But Jimmy was home too. He sat cross-legged on the couch watching football. He smiled when he saw her walk in.

"Hey, Summer."

"Hi Mr. Cooper."

"Walk?"

She nodded.

"Marissa's on the phone?"

She nodded again. He nodded back.

"You can watch with me if you want. New England against New York."

"Okay."

She sat down next to him and mimicked the Indian cross-legged-ness.

"Who's winning?"

"Patriots."

She sighed and leaned back, stretching her legs out in front of her.

"So, without being rude, can I ask you why you're here tonight? If Marissa had all these things to do, why did you choose tonight to be here? Not that we mind it."

"Um, it's just my dad. He's being difficult."

"I can understand. My dad was never the most understanding. What is it? Curfew, money, or what it usually is about, at least in this house: boys?"

"None of the above."

"Really? I'm impressed. What is it?"

"His girlfriend."

"What about Tracy?"

"They're getting a divorce so he can marry Lara."

"Oh. And you're playing second to her? And all his women?"

"Yeah."

"I'm sorry, kiddo."

"It's not your fault."

Jimmy gave her a reassuring smile and offered his arm. She crawled over and let him hug her. Jimmy always tried to be a father to her, especially when her own decided to be an asshole.

After another half hour, they had to eat dinner. Marissa picked, as usual, at her own plate while Summer tried to eat slower. Kaitlyn wouldn't look at Summer or Marissa, and Jimmy was the only one smiling.

"So, Kaitlyn, your mother tells me you want riding lessons. Could be fun. Marissa, you want to try?"

"No thanks, Daddy."

"You know, you should get a hobby too. Could be good for you."

"Yeah. I'm thinking about running for student council."

"Excellent. I was treasurer for my high school. It really is helpful in your life. What do you want to run for?"

"President."

"Aim high. Good. And you, Summer?"

"Um, well, I had wanted to go for vice president since fourth grade. Wouldn't it be awesome if we both made it, Coop?"

Marissa grinned and nodded.

"That would be so cool."

Jimmy smiled at both of them.

"Good luck, ladies. You both would make good leaders."

Summer grinned at Marissa. The rest of the dinner was more relaxed, especially since Jimmy was doing most of the talking.

After dinner, Marissa and Summer went back upstairs and Summer called her dad.

"Hey, Daddy? Um, I'm going to stay at Marissa's tonight. Yeah, Mr. and Mrs. Cooper said it was okay. _Yes_, we'll sleep. Okay. Say hi to Tracy. And Lara. Bye."

Summer hung up the phone and walked into Marissa's closet. She found a dark blue peasant top and pulled it over her head. It ended higher on her, and seemed to hug the waist that she kept staring at. But it wasn't bad. It was even almost cute. She spun around for Marissa.

"What do you think?"

"It's cute. You can wear it tomorrow."

She looked back at herself in the mirror and twirled around. Marissa's clothes almost never fit as they fit her, especially since Summer had gotten boobs before Marissa, and they had had time to get a whole lot bigger than Marissa's too. But it was almost right. And she decided it looked like it could've been meant to fit that way. She just had to find something for the bottom.

After an hour of realizing that none of Marissa's jeans would fit her, too small and too long, she found a burgundy skirt that seemed to look right. She pulled them off and slipped into a big tee shirt that she always slept in when she was at Marissa's. She fell into the bed next to Marissa and turned onto her side. Sleep was slow, but inevitable no matter what had happened that day. Surprisingly, her dreams didn't go directly to Lara and her father, but dawdled a little on Seth Cohen trying to make small talk with his grandfather, the most powerful man in Newport Beach.

_"Luka" written by Suzanne Vega_


	3. Just Shuffling the Sheets

_Note: This one came out a little shaky, but this story's actually flowing pretty well. After a few rewrites of course. This chapter's dedicated to my Alexander, for being one of the best rich, white boys I know and letting me know how the stereotypical guys actually act. He's the epitome of pretty fly for a white guy. Really the best friend a girl could have. Please read and review and sorry about the randomness. Peace and love y'all..._

"Look. It's a...shoe. Looks like an Olivia Morris."

"How do you know who designed it from a cloud? If it's a shoe, it's a shoe."

"_But_ this particular shoe is not particularly high, but very skinny, with a bump on the back which is most definitely a flower attached to the heel which means it's Olivia Morris's signature shoe."

Luke pivoted his head to look at Summer. She stared back at him and widened her eyes.

"What?"

"It's a shoe."

"Fine. Don't listen to me. Coop, your boyfriend is mean."

"Be nice, Luke."

"I'm always nice."

Summer pushed up onto her elbows and smiled to herself as Luke kissed Marissa's cheek. Marissa laughed at him.

"Oh, always."

"That's right."

Summer was basically living at the Coopers' because moving Tracy's stuff out and Lara's stuff in wasn't what she considered a fun time. Mr. Cooper had somewhat adopted her into his family and made Kaitlyn be relatively nice to her. And Mrs. Cooper never didn't like her. And she liked hanging out with Luke, which was pretty good because when you spent time with Marissa, time with Luke was inevitable. And, surprisingly, she didn't run into Seth as much as she thought she would. Not that she cared. Or noticed.

"Hey, so, spring break's next week and so I was thinking this Friday I want to have a party. So, both of you ladies have to come."

"Friday? Um..."

Marissa looked at Summer and raised her eyebrows. They were supposed to go to the movies or the mall or something then. It was going to be just like it used to be. Summer shrugged and pretended not to care. Marissa nodded.

"Yeah, sure. We'll be there."

"Great. Well, I have to go, so Summer, have fun with the clouds, and Marissa."

He kissed her quickly on the lips and left. Marissa sighed loudly and fell next to Summer in the grass with a grin on her face. Summer laughed.

"You really like him."

"Yes I do."

"I'm happy for you guys."

Marissa's smile faded slightly off her face and she patted Summer's arm.

"You'll find someone. I promise."

"Yeah?"

Summer looked down at her feet and smiled softly. She saw Marissa nod out of the corner of her eye.

"You're such a good person, Sum, it _has_ to happen."

She laughed again.

"You think it happens that way? What if there isn't a right person for me?"

"There is."

"How do you know? Or what if he finds someone else before he finds me?"

"Summer, just believe me, okay? It's going to happen for you."

"So you think you and Luke were meant to be? Like you guys could stay together for a long time?"

"Well, we've already been together for two years."

"Yeah."

Summer sat up and took yet another look at the Cohen house next door. No movement whatsoever. And it was a Thursday. Not that she cared.

"Coop? Do you ever...you know, get tired of this...place?"

"You mean Newport?"

"Yeah."

"I guess. Sometimes. But I mean, I think I belong here."

"Yeah." Summer turned onto her stomach so her back faced the sun. Marissa followed her.

"Why? Do you?"

"Sometimes. Pretty often recently."

"Listen, your dad is screwed up, but he'll figure it out. I know it."

"Yeah."

"So, do you..."

"Summer."

They both turned to the location of the voice. A shiny silver Porsche came rolling over. A very dramatically blonde woman rolled down the passenger window.

"There you are, sweetheart, your father wanted me to pick you up."

Summer put up one finger to Marissa and walked over to the perfect car. The woman inside pulled her sunglasses up and draped one end in between her lips.

"Lara, why does he need me home?"

"I don't know. He just told me to get you."

"I haven't been home in, like, three days. Why does he need me now?"

"I don't know. You can ask him."

"I don't want to ask him anything. And I'm not going."

"Summer, really. Just because you're not daddy's little girl anymore..."

"Don't _ever_ say anything close to that ever again."

"Okay, okay. Relax. Just please get in."

"No. Tell him if he wants me to come, then he'll have to come here himself."

"Summer, god, why are you being so difficult?"

"I'm not being difficult."

"Fine. Whatev. Just get in the car."

"No. My mother always told me not to get in cars with strangers. And how much do I know about you? You've been sleeping with my father. I don't even know how long."

"Shut up. You don't even have a mother so I wouldn't be making smart comments."

Summer leaned through the window and slapped the gorgeous woman across the cheek.

"You shut up, bitch."

She spun around and walked back to Marissa. Marissa had a look of disbelief on her face.

"Let's go inside, Coop."

She pulled Marissa in behind her. Lara sighed exasperatedly but drove away. Summer sat down Indian style on the floor in the front hall. The porcelain tiles were cold against her thighs. Marissa mimicked her and directly across from her. Summer brought her knees in and wrapped her arm around them.

"Summer...isn't it possible that...that she's not so bad?"

"Coop! You heard her! I don't have a mother and she's in here to sweep me out. I don't have a mother."

"Summer..."

"No. She's right. I don't have a mother. That-that woman isn't my mother. But she's gone anyway. And luckily I have a lovely replacement with only one boob job on her. Lucky me."

"She's just trying to get to you. Because she knows your dad loves you more than he..."

"He doesn't love me."

"Summer..."

"No, uh, I think I want to, um, go for a swim, okay? I'll be back."

Summer walked out the back door and walked down the porch to the perfect, sparkling blue pool. She hiked her shorts up higher and undid her hair. The last time she had swum with her clothes on was...like when she was 9. But she dived in and swam the length of the pool. And then again. And again.

After another dozen laps, she finally made her way over to the edge. Pushing up on her knuckles, she got out and let her legs dangle in the water while she squeezed all the excess water out of her hair. She leaned on the palms of her hands and rocked back and forth, trying to decide whether or not to go back in when the house next door exploded.

"_Whenever I come back, the air on railroad is making the same sounds.   
And the shop fronts on holly are dirty words, asterisks in for the vowels. We peered through the windows new bottoms on barstools but the people remain the same, with prices inflating. As if saved from the gallows. There's a bellow of buzzers and the people stop working and they're all so excited. Passing through unconscious states. When I awoke I was on the highway. With your hands on my shoulders, a meaningless movement... a movie script ending. And the patrons are leaving, leaving._"

She pulled her legs out and wrapped a towel around her still dripping hair and squeezed out her tank top. Served her right for wearing a black bra under a white shirt and not putting two and two together. But all the girls in her school thought they were Gwen Stefani, so she had to fit in. Not that it wasn't warm for March, but she started to shiver again. She walked into the house, where Marissa was walking out.

"What the hell is Cohen _doing_?"

Marissa ran over the lawn to their door and knocked as loud as she could. Doorbell, knock, doorbell...

"Marissa? Hey."

"What are you doing trying to make me go deaf? Where's your mother?"

"Not here. Sorry."

"Your dad?"

"Nope. Again, sorry."

"So you're having a party...alone."

"Well, you have caught me in the middle of my guitar solo..."

"That's not you. I'm not stupid; it's Death Cab For Cutie."

"Yes, that it is, but a good old fashioned air guitar never hurt anyone."

"Right, Cohen. Just a little more down, okay?"

"I'll try, but I don't know when the music is going to take me over."

"Right, Cohen."

"Hey, the rhythm _is_ going to get you too, mademoiselle."

"And now you're French?"

"Sure."

"God, you're such a..."

"Delightful talking to you too."

"Smartass."

"Hey, I'd rather be any kind of smart instead of...say, a water polo player."

"Shut up. You're just upset because you have no athletic ability whatsoever."

"But at least I don't shave my chest."

"That's because there's nothing there to shave."

"Oh, ouch. That hurt, Marissa. You really hurt me. I'm going off to cry, okay? But don't watch me because I'm embarrassed of being _such_ a wuss. So please, embarrass me no longer."

"Shut _up_, Cohen. You're such a jackass."

"So much for smart."

Marissa sighed exasperatedly and shook her head before just marching away. Seth shook his head but laughed a little bit too before turning his music down.

Marissa shook her head vigorously and fell down on her couch.

"Coop? What happened?"

"He thinks he's so much better than everyone else. And he likes making me mad. It's like a sport to him."

"Isn't it possible you...intimidate him or something?"

"No. I was nothing but nice to him since forever. And he just smirks and pretends he's king of the world."

"He might be nice sometimes, right?"

"He's even rude to his mother sometimes; I don't know what _you're_ talking about."

"I don't know, okay? I mean, I don't know him. But isn't it possible that you scare him a little because I mean, he doesn't have it as easy as some people think."

"What are you, his psychiatrist?"

"No."

"Well, then, why are you defending him?"

"I'm just _saying_, Coop."

"Well, you don't know him, so just pretend to be on my side."

"I don't have to pretend, Coop. You know I'm going to be on your side. I'm just saying..."

"Just stop. We're not going to agree."

"Okay."

"Okay. I need something to drink. What do you want?"

"Diet coke?"

"You got it."


	4. So Here's Your Holiday

_Note: Okay, this chapter was easier. But I found out that my lovely computer cut the last chapter off, but I think it was better like this, so I guess it's okay. But since it was cut off I didn't get to give my homie Ben Gibbard credit for "Movie Script Ending." Newsflash, you guys, the lead singer of Death Cab For Cutie wrote the song that I mentioned was sung by none other than Death Cab For Cutie. That song has been in my head all friggin day...okay, that's it. This chapter's a little more dramatic and next chapter gets to be a wedding. And I _am _a girl so I do love weddings. Please leave a review; I love my little review alerts. Peace and love..._

Summer blew a bubble and let it pop back into her mouth. Marissa was downstairs watching something on t.v. but Summer was comfortable just lying down and...thinking or something. She hadn't been home for a week and didn't plan on going back anytime soon. Her father was getting married next Sunday. Tracy was officially out, and Lara was in. So Summer didn't plan on going back for at least another month. She was _so_ not in the mood to be around the newlyweds. She had to go to the wedding, though. Almost all of Newport was going to be there, mostly out of respect, for she was sure that no one really liked her dad that much. And no one knew who Lara was. Apparently she had done some modeling awhile ago, but Summer hadn't seen anything.

There was a soft knock on the door. Summer didn't even turn her head.

"Marissa's downstairs."

"Summer, sweetheart, can I talk to you?"

"Uh, yeah, Mr. Cooper, come in."

She sat up and pushed her gum back into her mouth. Jimmy came in with a forced smile on his face. He sat on the bed next to her.

"Summer, are you sure you're okay with all this? I mean, you know that neither my wife nor I mind you staying here; we're glad to have you. But is something wrong at home or something? Because they are your family."

"Yeah, I know, it's just very...they're getting ready for the wedding and all, so I guess it's better to be here. Stay out of their way. But I mean, if you guys want me to go soon, then..."

"No, no. That's not it at all. We love having you here. It's good for Marissa. Can I just ask you, I mean without sounding rude, when you'll be going back home?"

Suddenly, she was extremely embarrassed. She was coming off as the little girl who hated her parents and depended on someone else. People that weren't responsible for her were providing for her.

"Um, soon. Probably in about a week. You know, let them have some time alone and then get back."

He nodded and smiled.

"Okay. We're going to be eating outside, so if you want to get dressed."

"Um, okay, thanks."

She smiled back and he left. She looked down at her pajamas and changed her pants into soft shorts. She put a bra on under her tank top and pulled her hair up. On the way out, she caught Marissa.

"Hey, what did my dad say to you?"

"He just wanted to know how long I was going to stay."

"Oh. Okay. What did you tell him?"

"Next week."

"You really going to go next week?"

"Yeah, I mean, I said I would, so..."

"But aren't your par...your dad and Lara going on a honeymoon for, like, three weeks?"

"Yeah."

"You're going to be alone?"

"Yeah, it's-it's okay."

"Are you sure? Because my dad wouldn't mind..."

"No, it's okay. I'll go."

"But Summer..."

"It's okay. Let's eat."

She grinned and walked past Marissa. Marissa watched her leave with a frown on her face as her best friend pretended to not care about being in her huge house all alone for three weeks.

Summer was sick of it. She was sick of watching Marissa pick at a salad and ignoring her hamburger all together. She was sick of her father trying to call her and tell her how much he loved her. She was sick of everyone telling her to believe him. She was sick of pretending to be something she could never be. Happy.

She lay across the table after they had finished eating and watched the stars fall into their places. A mist seemed to rebound off of the grass that made her feel tired. Maybe she was making it all up.

"Summer."

She sat up smoothly and saw Seth sitting on the roof of his parents' car.

"You were just watching me?"

"Hey, I was out here before you. And so, sorry, beautiful, but no. I wasn't just watching you."

"You don't have to act like you're smarter than me." He opened his mouth but she cut him off. "And if you say 'who's acting,' I swear I'll hit you."

"That actually was not what I was going to say."

"Oh. What was it then?"

"I guess you'll never know. You should trust me more, beautiful."

"Can you stop calling me that?"

"What? Beautiful? Why?"

"Because...because I'm not."

He looked at her with his head cocked a little bit and shook it vigorously.

"Excuse me, what?"

"I'm not...that."

"Are you _serious_? Have you, I mean, have you _seen_ you?"

"Stop, okay? It's not funny."

"You're right. It's not funny. You don't see it? You're gorgeous."

"Cohen, stop."

"Oh my god. I mean, you hear that girls have low self esteem, but damn. I mean, if _you_ can't see it, then I feel bad for some of those other girls."

"Cohen...just..."

"Summer. You're gorgeous and I don't know what these people have been telling you, but you've always _been_ gorgeous."

"You talk a lot."

"Yeah."

She could feel the smile creeping back to her lips and she shook her head while she started to laugh. He grinned.

"What?"

"You're so...different."

"Is that a bad thing?"

"I dunno, Cohen."

"Okay."

He grinned farther and she shook her head with a smile spread across her face.

"How do you do it?"

"Do what?"

"Make me smile."

"Just lucky I guess."

The door opened behind Summer, who spun around.

"Coop! Hi, um, what's up?"

"You coming in? You wanna watch a movie or something?"

"Uh, yeah, sure. Just one minute, okay?"

"Okay. Were you talking to someone out here?"

"Um, no. Why?"

"Thought I heard something. Never mind. See you in a sec."

"All right, Coop."

Marissa smiled and closed the door. Summer spun back around to look at Seth. He had his eyebrows scrunched up again.

"Listen, Cohen, I have to..."

"Why-why didn't you tell her you were talking to...I dunno, me?"

"Cohen, it's not imp..."

"Not important? You completely froze me out. I don't matter or something?"

"No. No, that's-that's not it. I just..."

"Don't want anyone to know you were actually speaking to me."

"You don't know me; you can't finish my sentences."

"But I think I know what you mean. Where you're coming from. I'm not from your circle of friends. Of course you weren't _speaking_ to me."

"Why do you have to be so difficult?"

"I'm not being difficult."

"Oh really? Could've fooled me."

"You don't know what you're doing. You're afraid of the people you hang out with. You don't have anyone you can completely trust. No one."

"I have Marissa, dickhead. Don't pretend to know me so goddamn well."

"But you're not able to tell Marissa that you were talking to me. Because you were...afraid of what she might say. Or that she might say something to her lovely boyfriend who might tell other people that you think are your friends and then you'll be ridiculed for the rest of your life. And believe me, and I would know, that's not a lot of fun."

"Cohen, what are you..."

"And the 'Cohen' thing? What's that?"

"It's your name."

"Try, uh, no. It's my last name. But I guess I can forgive that. You're the kind of person where it only matters what family you belong to. You don't care who I am. Who's the jackass now?"

"Did you just call me a..."

"Wait. That was Marissa."

"You don't even know who you're making fun of anymore. You're pathetic. You want people to think you don't care and that you're all that when you don't even think it yourself. That's kind of really sad."

"You don't know me either, princess."

He said it with so much sarcasm that tears almost sprung to her eyes. She had gone from an honest beautiful to a snide princess in a few minutes. Had to be a record. And it was also what her father called her.

"Shut up. Bye, _Cohen_."

"Ooh, that was a good one."

She stuck up her middle finger and meant it for the first time in her life. He rolled his eyes and looked away. Looked away so that she couldn't see the tears that had sprung to his eyes too.

Summer walked into the Coopers' house and wiped away the threats of tears that were messing up her makeup. Marissa was walking toward her so she lifted her mouth into a yawn.

"Hey, Sum, do you...wait. Were you crying?"

"N-N-No." Stifle another yawn. "Sorry, Coop, I'm so tired. D'you think we could do this some other time?"

"Um, yeah, sure. I mean, if you're that tired."

"Yeah. Okay. See you tomorrow. Night Coop."

"Summer, tomorrow's your father's wedding."

"Oh right. I forgot."

"Um, okay. So you have to get up at 8. so maybe it is a good thing you're going to bed now."

"Yeah. All right. Night, Coop."

"Good night, Sum. Love you."

"Love you too."

Summer went up to Marissa's room and stole a look at the gown Lara had given her a few days ago. It was a light pink and had a lov cut boat neck. It fell somewhere right above the knees. Right beneath her breasts there was a princess hem with a darker pink twisted cord. The perfect gown for a princess aiding the queen. Lara. She was going to be her stepmother a week after her previous stepmother's divorce had been final from her father. Lara. Sounded like a queen's name.

She rolled over on top of the comforter, trapping herself inside it. No air holes. Her hair spilled out onto the pillow and she stared at the ceiling once again. Seth hated her. That was another one. Everyone hated her these days. Her father, Lara, Tracy, Mr. Cooper, Mrs. Cooper, Luke, even Marissa. Seth had been safe. He told her he liked her. A lot. But she ruined that too. He was right, too. She didn't have any friends she could trust. Marissa had Luke and she sure as hell liked him more than Summer. And her mother had...well, sometimes apparently Lara wasn't as dumb as she looked.

And she had to go to their goddamn wedding.

Marissa came in about an hour later. Summer pretended to be asleep as she slid into the bed next to her. She didn't want to talk to Marissa. Marissa didn't understand.

Summer got up wordlessly the next morning at six to get ready. She wasn't going to look like crap when Lara picked her up. That would give Lara too much power.

She pulled the dress over her head and looked at herself in the mirror. She looked different. She looked like a clone of Lara and her posse. She brushed her hair a dozen times and twisted it up high and stuck a jaw clip over it. She did her own makeup and it wasn't that bad. A little too much eyeliner, but it worked. She found a purse that matched; a light pink bunched Chanel with a beaded strap that fell gracefully over her shoulder.

She looked older. She looked like one of those girls that giggled uncontrollably when her father spoke. She looked like she belonged in Newport. She slid her eyeliner under her eye one more time. And she changed her necklace. It was a cross that Tracy had given her for her thirteenth birthday. It was black with a silver border. The chain linked around her neck, but the cross barely disappeared into her neckline. This was all she had to fight the stereotype. She was going to be a noopsie when she grew up. She was going to find some rich kid with a trust fund and they wouldn't be happy together. She would borrow his checkbook and he would sign blank checks for her so she could buy anything she wanted. Or she'd write them to cash and just have a lot of cash on her at all times. She'd smile behind Gucci sunglasses and cross her legs in front of the pool boy. She'd have dozens of affairs and become Lara. Or she'd just leave. Soon too. Run away. Who would notice? And if they did, who would care?

She painted on a smile and kissed Marissa's forehead before running out. She waited at the end of Marissa's driveway for the evil step mother to be to arrive. She leaned against the gate and picked at her nails. She finally gave up and pulled a nail file out of her purse. After finishing exactly one nail, she dropped the file into the wet grass.

"Dammit."

She bent down to pick up the file and felt something sweep past her back. Taking a peek over her shoulder, she saw him slide up his driveway. He didn't look at her. This was so stupid.

"Cohen!"

His face turned to hers, most definitely due to shock, but he did look at her. And that was something.

"What?"

"I...uh..."

"Yeah, well I uh too."

He slipped into his house and slammed the door. She shook her head as Lara's familiar perfect car came rolling up.

"Get in."

"Why, thank you, Lara, I will."

"Don't be smart."

"Why? So I can be like you?"

"You can't even be nice to me on my _wedding_ day?"

"I'm nice."

"Since when?"

"I could be nice if you were nice to me."

"I am nice to you."

"Oh, sure. But let's just be nice for my dad. You can slap me when you're done but be nice for him."

"Duh, kid. I'm not stupid."

"Could've fooled me."

"Shut up."

"You first."

Lara sighed and drove straight to the church without another year. Summer blinked her eyes over and over again. This was really going to happen.


	5. Feed You On the Guilt

_Note: Okay, this one's not one of my favorites. It's a little awkward but I got everything to come out that I wanted to. I know so many people just want to see Summer and Seth together, and while I'm all for writing AU, this isn't supposed to be completely AU. I want this to have been able to happen before The O.C. started. So, obviously, in the end, Summer and Seth can't be together. And damn, I miss Ryan. Usually when I get bored, I can throw in a sweet Ryan and Seth bonding scene, but he's not here. So, I'm probably going to write about two more chapters with them being thirteen, then pick a date in fourteen, fifteen, and end with a chapter probably during the pilot or the day before. You don't have to pretend to understand all that I just said, just know that there's probably going to be five or six more chapters. Thank for listening and please review. Peace and love..._

Summer crossed her legs and started picking at her nails again. Lara was standing behind her and she could see her perfectly in the vanity mirror in front of her. She was holding her strapless Badgley Mischka against her breasts and peeking at her ass in the mirror behind her. Summer rolled her eyes. All of Lara's bridesmaids looked like they came straight out of a Victoria Secret catalog with the fake boobs to match. And Summer was just there to make Lara's pookie happy. Neil had insisted on having his daughter in the wedding, so Lara and her friends put up with it. Summer had to fight the temptation to ask them all if they met at a strip club on stage. They certainly looked it. Summer pulled on her headphones and reclined in her chair.

"_Why did you steal the matches from the one room motel? Once they gave you answers, now they give you hell. They will never understand. They wonder where did they go wrong. How could you be so selfish? Why can't you get along? And as you pray in your darkness for wings to set you free. You are bound to your silent legacy. You've seen it in the movies, and you've heard it on the street. Craving the affection, your blood is full of heat. They don't listen to your reasons as original as sin. Deny all that you feel, and they will bring you home--_"

"Summer, come _on_. We have to_ go_."

"Lara, god, chill babe." The redhead bridesmaid pulled up her gown and brushed a strand of hair behind her shoulder. They had made Summer take down her hair; the girl with black hair had brushed it for her.

"Sorry. But let's go, Summer."

"All right. All right."

Summer stood up and smoothed out her skirt. She took the white rose and orchid bouquet a blonde, the most abundant hair color, handed her and pushed her hair behind her shoulders. She didn't really want to do this. All the models in their designer gowns and then there was her. The short thirteen year old who had a few extra pounds. At least she had hints of boobs.

The string quartet started playing and the gauze separating them from the hundreds of people pulled apart. Summer searched the crowds, found Marissa, Holly, Luke, Tamara, Brad, Chad, John, and...there he was. Cohen. He was wearing a black jacket and followed his mother's gaze to the girls. His tie was diagonally striped with burgundy and black and his hair was actually combed. And he was looking at her now. And she looked back and raised her eyebrows. He nodded slowly. And then they walked.

The thing about the kind of wedding her father had insisted upon was you stood there forever. The priest or minister or whatever guy actually officiated the ceremony blessed them over and over and Summer couldn't help but let her mind wander to Neil and Tracy's wedding. This one was prettier she decided. But she had wanted that one to work more than she wanted this one too. But Lara looked so goddamn happy. And so did Neil. Vomit.

The ceremony went by without anyone running in to tell them not to do it, so Lara became Mrs. Neil Roberts. Summer's step mother. She was giggling like mad and it annoyed Summer to no end, but she couldn't help but feel something in the pit of her stomach. They looked so happy. Then they took photos and the reception hall and they were kissing each other and laughing and smiling and she couldn't help but smile softly too. She sat at a table alone before Marissa and the rest of them got there and watched them taking pictures. After a while, Neil even gestured her to come and Lara seemed to be too happy to object. So Summer slipped in between them and couldn't help but smile along. She had pictures with just her father, even some with just Lara. And she was grinning in all of them. Not that she wanted to.

Everybody came and they all congratulated her father, step mother, and even Summer on such a lovely service and wished them the best of luck. Marissa ran up to her and hugged her tight. She was wearing a gold dress with black chiffon covering it in patterns of flowers and swirls. Gorgeous. When she pulled away, she had small tears in her eyes.

"Sum, I'm so sorry. I've been bad to you and...I mean, you needed me. So over the next few weeks whenever you want some company, give me a call and I promise I'll come. No matter what."

"It's okay, Coop. Thank you though. Love you."

Marissa smiled and let her tears drop.

"Love you too."

She grabbed her hand and kissed her knuckle before going away with her mom, dad, Kaitlyn, and Luke. Mrs. Cohen even gave her a hug. She looked gorgeous, in a way that only she could. Her hair was straightened and seemed to bounce rays off of her silver dress with a drape neckline. She smiled at Summer and said she looked beautiful. Summer blushed enough and glanced around her as she walked by. Seth was walking closely behind her. He took a look at her dress but kept walking. She sighed as quietly as she could so it didn't sound too dramatic, but put her smile back on for her dad's parents.

There could've easily been five hundred people there. Summer didn't know most of them, but she had seen most of them before. There was Lara's family, who she thankfully had never met; there was her father's family, they mostly liked her; then, there were the noopsies. So many noopsies. She saw the lights go down and her father and his bride go to the center of the dance floor. Her father had gotten Bryan Adams to come through some patient, so Summer started hearing the strands of "Heaven" fading in. Whenever she was at weddings, it was usually the first dance that could make her cry. The tears were already threatening to come. Then, her father slipped his hands to Lara's waist and she leaned her head on his chest, and the tears started to fall.

"_Oh, thinking about our younger years. There was only you and me. We were young and wild and free. Now nothing can take you away from me. We've been down that road before. But that's over now. You keep me coming back for more. And baby you're all that I want. When you're lying here in my arms. It's getting hard to believe; we're in heaven. And love is all that I need, and I found it there in your heart. It isn't too hard to see, we're in heaven._"

She really was crying. Lara was clutching her father's back just like...well, all the other girls did. And then she felt bad for feeling like that, but those thoughts kept coming back. Just like all the others.

Marissa walked over silently, trying not to bother anyone and sat next to her friend. She was trying to keep up that promise she had given her. She took her hand and nodded. Summer smiled and wiped away her tears gently.

"Honey, it's okay."

Marissa whispered and brushed away a strand of hair from Summer's face. Summer nodded softly, and tried to believe it.

"_Oh, once in your life you find someone who will turn your world around. Bring you up when you're feeling down. Yeah, nothing can change what you mean to me. There's a lot I could say, but just hold me now. Cause our love will light the way._"

"She doesn't really love him."

"You don't know that, baby."

"It's a pretty educated guess."

"Honey, be happy for them."

"I was."

"It will be okay. If your dad is happy, then, I mean, there's nothing you can really do about it. But wish them luck."

"But she hates me."

"No she doesn't."

"She sure as hell acts like it."

Summer's voice was rising, so Marissa brought a finger up to her lips, so she wouldn't embarrass herself.

"Honey, it's okay."

"Sure."

She looked back at them, and they did look happy. They looked like the perfect couple, besides the face that he looked twenty years older than her. But he was only seven, so it wasn't horrible. But it still just didn't look right. They didn't look comfortable enough together.

After the song was finally over, Lara kissed Neil and sat down next to the few girlfriends she had that weren't dancing. Neil walked over to his daughter and offered her his hand.

"You don't want to dance with Lara?"

"I do. But I want to dance with you too."

She smiled, shook her head, and let him take her hand.

"_Rescue me from the mire. Whisper words of desire. Rescue me, darling, rescue me. With your arms open wide, want you here by my side. Come to me, darling, rescue me. When this world's closing in, there's no need to pretend. Set me free, darling, rescue me._"

He wrapped his arms around her and she seemed to disappear into his shirt. He smelled like Armani and his shirt was warm. His chin tickled her head as he held her closer against him. And for a second, Lara didn't seem to matter. Or even exist.

"_I don't wanna let you go, so I'm standing in your way. I never needed anyone like I'm needing you today. Do I have to say the words? Do I have to tell the truth? Do I have to shout it out? Do I have to say a prayer? Must I prove to you, how good we are together? Do I have to say the words?_"

She had heard about father daughter dances being cheesy, but she didn't care what everybody was thinking. She hadn't seen her dad in forever; she hadn't let him hug her even longer. But he seemed to have stayed the same.

"Daddy?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you."

"I didn't do anything."

"For putting up with me."

"Oh. Okay. I love you, princess."

"I love you too."

"_Rescue me from despair. Tell me you will be there. Help me please, darling rescue me. Every dream that we share. Every cross that we bear. Can't you see, darling, rescue me. I don't wanna let you go, so I'm standing in your way. I never needed anyone like I'm needing you today._"

Out of the corner of her eye, she caught Seth looking at her again. He was leaning back in his chair next to his mother and father. Kirsten had a soft look in her eyes and she was watching Summer dance with her father too. Everyone was making it out to be something of an amazing thing.

After the song ended, Neil kissed his daughter on the cheek and smiled at her. She smiled back up at him and he cupped her cheek.

"You're really growing up into a beautiful young woman."

"Dad..."

"It's true. You're beautiful."

"Thank you."

He smiled one last time and left her in the middle of the dance floor for his bride. She glanced down at her hands and walked off.

She spent most of the songs sitting off with Marissa. Luke had danced with Marissa a few times, and even once with Summer, but the two girls were trying to be best friends again. Summer pushed back on her chair's legs until they pushed off the floor as Lara laughed with her husband to 'Summer of 69.' Marissa was watching her with a sigh on her face.

"Sum, she's going to be better. I mean, she should, right?"

"I dunno. She's always going to be Lara."

"You know every time I hear that name I think of Lana? You know, Turner? I read the diary of her...hairstylist I think, and Lara really reminds me of her."

"Lana Turner?"

"Yeah, Madonna sang about her in 'Vogue.'"

"Hmm."

Jimmy walked over to Marissa and tapped her on the shoulder.

"Sweetie, come on. Dance with me."

Marissa shot a look at Summer who nodded instantly.

"Go ahead. Really."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah."

"Okay. Just one song."

"Have fun, Coop."

Marissa smiled and walked off with her dad as a softer song started playing. Summer recognized it from Robin Hood as she saw Lara clutching her father closer. Lana Turner. Hmm.

Summer stood up and walked out of the room. She wandered around the front hall of the huge reception hall, looking at pictures put up on the wall of couples that had had their receptions there. They all looked so happy. Silently, Summer wondered how many of them had ended in divorce. Or just tears.

"Summer."

She turned her head from a very blonde couple to see Seth leaning in the door to the room full of crooning Bryan Adams.

"Hey."

"Hey."

"Hi."

"Look, uh, I'm sorry I...you know, yelled at you. I was just...I dunno. Upset."

"It's okay."

"I'm really sorry I said those things to you though. I don't have the right to tell you that you don't have real friends. It was..."

"Cohen. It's okay."

"Okay."

"I'm sorry I keep calling you Cohen. Habit."

"It's okay."

"Okay."

"So, um, I dunno, you wanna...dance, or something?"

"Really? With you?"

"Yeah."

"Yeah, sure."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"Okay."

"Okay."

"You know we used the word okay like ten billion times."

"I know."

"Okay."

"Right."

He smiled, took her hand, and they went back into the room.

"_Look into my eyes. You will see, what you mean to me. Search your heart, search your soul. And when you find me there you'll search no more._"

If he was scared, somehow he found a way to hide it. He touched her waist and let his hands relax. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him in closer. She heard him breathe in as quietly as she could, and she couldn't help the smile that spread to her lips.

"_Don't tell me it's not worth trying for. You can't tell me it's not worth dying for. You know it's true, everything I do, I do it for you. Look into your heart, you will find. There's nothing there to hide. Take me as I am, take my life. I would give it all, I would sacrifice._"

She should've probably apologized right then. For not telling Marissa she had been talking to him and not acknowledging his existence in school. She told herself it was because she didn't want to hurt the mood and what she was feeling with his warm fingers tickling her waist. But somewhere she knew that it was because she couldn't promise she wouldn't do it again. Because no matter how different she wanted to be from the stereotype and hoe much she wanted to be able to just say screw you to half the people in the room, she fit. She fit in and that was important. She wanted some safety. And right then...it just didn't work. So she kept her mouth shut.

"_Don't tell me it's not worth fighting for. I can't help it, there's nothing I want more. You know it's true. Everything I do, I do it for you. There's no love, like your love. And no other, could give more love. There's nowhere, unless you're there. All the time, all the way. Oh, you can't tell me it's not worth tryin' for. I can't help it, there's nothing I want more. I would fight for you; I'd lie for you. Walk the wire for you; yeah, I'd die for you_."

She looked up at him; he was still so much taller than she was. His head was bent gently over her shoulder. She looked around her, Luke was smiling at Marissa and she was smiling back; she noticed how they were basically the same height. Tamara and John were dancing too; his hands were almost on her ass. Holly was dancing with Chad, promising Brad that he would get the next dance. These people were her world. She knew them so well, even though most of them knew nothing about her. And then there was Cohen. Seth.

"_You know it's true. Everything I do, I do it for you._"

He was looking at her now, almost smiling. She glanced around at the people surrounding her, all with their lives that seemed to be all the same. It was her life too. She wasn't supposed to take walks with a boy skateboarding next to her; it was wrong to talk at night on top of a table with a kid sitting on a car. They were still kids and for her...she just didn't do this. She had to forget him.

"Cohen, I-I have to go. T-Thank you for the-the dance."

She slipped away, leaving him in the middle of the floor this time. She went back out of the room and fell against the wall next to the blonde couple. The laughing, blonde couple. Laughing like hell. That was what her father used to say about her mother. She laughed like hell. Like she forgot what was going around her and just laughed because it was all funny. It was all a joke. She was too tired to be serious. But when she had left the year before, there had been no jokes. She promised to call, but she never did. That was when Summer first started to lose her dad. She had been told by her grandmother that she had the same smile as Clarissa. Clarissa with her red hair and gray eyes and smile that her father laughed about. 'It could launch a hundred thousand ships.' He'd grin. Then came Tracy. And-and now Lara. Tracy had slipped her father out of her grasp and taken him into a world of over worked men trying to avoid their homes. And Lara just shopped.

Marissa fell against the wall next to her without a sound. She spoke without turning to look at her.

"Hey."

"Hey."

"So, how-how are you, I guess."

"I've been better."

"Sum, were you...dancing with-with Cohen?"

"Um...yeah."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

_ "Silent Legacy" written by Melissa Etheridge_

_"Heaven" written by Bryan Adams and Jim Vallance_

_"Do I Have To Say the Words" written by Bryan Adams, Robert John Lange, and Jim Vallance_

_"(Everything I Do) I Do It For You" written by Bryan Adams, Robert John Lange, and Michael Kamen_


	6. And I'd Be Your Memory

Summer sat cross legged on her couch, staring at the t.v. Some Real World member was bitching about some boyfriend. If you cheated on the guy, why are _you_ crying? What about him? Selfish bitch. Somewhere that seemed far away, the doorbell rang.

"It's open. Oh, unless you're a mass murderer. Then, my daddy's upstairs."

The door opened and Marissa walked in.

"Hey, did you get dressed at all today?"

Summer looked down at her p.j.s and shook her head. Marissa put on her sad face and sat down on the couch next to her.

"Coop, don't do that."

"What?"

"The whole 'I understand' thing. I'm okay."

"When's your dad getting back?"

"Tomorrow."

"Okay. So, you want me to stay here tonight?"

"Do _you_ want to stay here tonight?"

Marissa shrugged. Summer looked back at the t.v. The damn girl was crying again.

"Then, no. It's okay, Coop. You don't have to be there for everything. I'll be all right."

"But Sum..."

"Coop. Just stop."

"Okay, okay. So, how's Cohen?"

"How would I know?"

"Well, you guys looked pretty close at the wedding and..."

"It was just a dance, Coop, not a proposal."

"Okay, relax. I dunno, you guys looked cute together."

"Aw. But isn't this the guy that you said was so rude and that you yelled at me for defending?"

Marissa's face fell and she sunk back into the couch.

"Yeah."

"All right."

Summer pulled her legs out from under her and propped them up on the coffee table.

"Summer, are you mad at me or something?"

"No."

"Are you sure?"

"Dammit, Coop, yes. I'm sure."

"Because your dad's marriage can't have been easy..."

"Coop. Just shut up. You don't know what you're saying."

"I'm sorry."

"Sorry about what?"

"About everything. You're a good person, Sum, and you don't deserve any of it."

"Yeah, well what happens happens."

"Mm-hmm."

Marissa turned her head and looked at her. She looked younger curled up on the couch, pretending she didn't care. Summer looked back at her.

"What?"

Marissa smiled. Summer smiled back.

"What?"

"Nothing."

She turned her head back and Summer did the same. But she crawled over on the couch and pulled her arms around her friend. Summer tried not to smile, but lost in the end and hugged her back.

"Sum, I really am sorry."

"I know."

"Love you."

"Love you too."

"So you want me to stay tonight?"

"Yes."

"Okay."

"Okay."

Marissa pulled back away from her and was slightly surprised to see tears in her eyes.

"Baby?"

"Yeah."

"It's going to be okay."

"Mm-hmm."

They watched the Real World-ers until they fell asleep, each girl curled up on one side. Summer seemed to dream too much these days. About her dad, about Lara, about Marissa, and about Patrick Bergin and Uma Thurman in medieval dress. But this was her favorite. Dreamless sleep. Just relaxing into a world that she knew she would forget in the morning. But she didn't care.

Marissa shook her awake the next morning, telling her they had to go school. She was already dressed. Summer was still unconscious.

"Coop, not now."

"Sum, come on. We're going to be late."

"Mmm..."

"Sum..."

Marissa rubbed her back and slapped it once.

"Come on."

"Mmm..."

"Sum."

"Fine. God, I'm...up."

Summer swung her legs around the bed and stood up with an exaggerated yawn. Marissa rolled her eyes, but turned to leave the room.

"I'm going to make toast."

"You? Are going to cook?"

"I can cook."

Summer snorted and Marissa shook her head.

"You're supposed to have my back."

"Sorry, babe. You go _cook_ that toast."

"Ha-ha. The sarcasm is not needed."

"Okay. I'm sorry, hon."

"All right. Get dressed."

"Yes, ma'am."

Summer came down ten minutes later dressed in a navy blue tube top with a white palm tree on the side and white jeans. Marissa put two plates down on the table with two pieces of very well done toast tossed lazily onto them. Summer raised her eyebrows but sat next to Marissa at the table. She nibbled on the edge of one piece and put it down and looked back at Marissa.

"What?"

"Look, babe, I'm all for you expanding your horizons, but do I have to pretend to like this?"

"Yes."

"Okay. So I can't make some edible toast?"

"No."

"Okay."

Summer bit back into the toast and shook her head. She walked up to the fridge and grabbed a jar of jam. She dumped half of it onto the one piece of toast and bit it again.

"Mmm...it _is_ good."

"Ha, you're funny."

Marissa was nibbling warily at the toast herself, but just put it down and drank her glass of water instead. Forget jam. Summer had finished almost all of it anyway.

Jimmy came over half an hour later with an offer to drive them to school. Summer had pulled her hair up into a sloppy ponytail and put on a silver link necklace and big hoops. Since her dad and Lara were coming home, she had to look like she didn't care, but was doing fine. Happy. Right.

Summer trudged over to her locker and cupped her bag over her shoulder. She pulled out a few books and got the locker to open on the first try. She dumped a couple books into it and grabbed a few and threw them on the floor. She grabbed her purse and tossed that onto the floor. She was one of the only girls in Harbor that didn't mind throwing her plum Dolce & Gabbana on the floor. She grabbed a bunch of stuff, the purse and headed off to class. She got a lot of smiles on her way and a few 'hey's mostly from people she knew. But she didn't see him. He seemed to have been ignoring her. Or trying to. Occasionally, she'd see his eyes looking at her in a class, but mostly he stayed out of her way. But she was really scared that she had hurt him.

School seemed to go slower than usual, but she got out alive. As she was walking out with Marissa, a limo pulled up. A few kids shot looks at it, mostly to see who sent a limo to a school, but most didn't notice. A driver came out and stopped Summer.

"Miss Roberts, your father sent me to get you. And Miss Cooper if she would like to come."

"Uh, sure. Let me call my dad."

Marissa pulled out her phone and the two girls slid into the back seat. The driver got back in and started driving. Marissa hung up the phone and looked back at Summer.

"So."

"So."

"Would it be rude if I asked what happened with you and Cohen?"

"No."

"Would you answer me?"

Summer sighed and waved her hand in some sort of agreement.

"Well, I mean, you know he danced with me. But towards the end, I just...freaked or something, but I ran out. So, he caught me the next day when I went for one of those long walks and asked me what happened. And I was, like, I dunno, it was just weird. Then he asked me why and I got kind of upset. I said it was hard for me to just talk to him because so many of my friends didn't know him that well and you know, usually we all know each other's boyfriends or girlfriends or whatever. Then, he got upset and told me it shouldn't matter, but I said that it did. And that was just the way it was. Then, he seemed to be hurt or something and I didn't know what to say. So I said I had to go and I'd see him in school. And I've seen him, but neither of us was really brave enough to say anything about it."

"Oh."

"Yeah, oh."

"You know, that's a lot of bullshit. If you really liked him, you know we would've understood."

Summer looked at her and shook her head.

"Well, I would."

"No you wouldn't. You don't like him. Neither do most of the people we hang out with."

"But do you?"

"I don't know. I don't think so."

"Is that...maybe a lie?"

"No. I don't like him. I can't like him. He's...I mean, he's Seth Cohen."

"So? He likes you."

"Yeah."

"So you're not being unreasonable?"

"Coop, you can't honestly say that if I said I did like him, and I thought about him all the time, and I was going to ask him to be my boyfriend...that you would be totally okay with it. You might pretend to be, but you'd be laughing on the inside. And some people aren't that good at hiding what they think."

"But Sum..."

"No buts. It just...has to be this way. There's nothing I can do about it and there's nothing you can do about it."

"But if you..."

"But what if I don't. And I don't, so there's no what if."

"Sum, didn't you say you wanted something like me and Luke had? What if Cohen could give you that?"

"He's still Cohen."

"You're not being stubborn?"

"I'm not being stubborn, Coop. I'm being real."

"Fine. I just think you're being a little dramatic. But it's your life."

"You don't like him though. You think he's cocky and annoying and all that. You can't just change your opinion because he smiles at me a lot. You don't understand."

"Okay. Don't get mad at me."

"I'm not."

"Okay."

"Okay."

Summer crossed her arms and leaned back in her seat. Marissa was keeping up her perfect posture. She didn't look back at her for the rest of the ride back to Marissa's house.

_Note: Okay, so I wanted to get this one out before I left, so sorry it's shorter than the other ones. I'm leaving for vacation for about ten days, so it's going to be a little while before I can get the next one out. I can try, but it's doubtful. If I get bored, though, I'll try to write. Next chapter's going to be more about Summer's new family. Leave a review. Peace and love..._


	7. Take it to the End of the Line

She hated this new 'happy family' thing. They ate together, watched t.v. together, went to the movies together, and it wasn't natural. She didn't want to be there.

Picking at yet another meal made by the maid, Summer was trying desperately to ignore the looks her father was giving her. He was trying to smile and pretend they were all having a good time, while everyone else in the room was trying to plan an escape route.

"So, Summer, how was school?"

"Fine."

"That's good."

"Okay."

Her newly bought cell phone rang from underneath the tablecloth. She picked it up, flipped it open, and brought it to her ear.

"_Summer_, I told you, I didn't want that phone at the t..."

"Hello? Oh, hi. Yeah. Nothing at all. One sec, okay? All right."

She stood up and gave a forced smile to her father and his whore. Her step mother, whatev. Same thing.

"This call _simply_ cannot wait, I'm sorry. I'll be right back."

It was her dad's speech down to the fake smile. She turned around and rolled her eyes before running up the stairs and falling backward onto her bed.

"So, Luke, what do you want?"

"I want to have this party thing for Marissa and I wanted to know if you could help."

"Ummm...I think so. When do you want to have it?"

"Like, on her birthday."

"Oh, who's the smart one, now?"

"I _always_ was the smart one, Summer."

"Aw, that hurts. The jock is putting me in my place."

"Are you going to help me?"

"Okay, yes, but only for two reasons. And neither one is because I'm in love with you."

"Shoot. How will I survive? Okay, let me guess." Luke let his voice skip and octave and Summer wince. "'One is because I love "Coop." And I'd do anything for her. Two is because I hate "Lana" and my father. And I'd do anything to get away from them.'"

"Not bad. So when do you want to do this?"

"Tomorrow? Like after school. Do you know where my house is?"

"No. I told you, I'm not in love with you."

"Okay, relax." He gave her his address and she scribbled it down on some old birthday card her father had given her.

"Okay. I'll be there. But Luke? You have to promise me one thing."

"And what is that?"

"You won't fall in love with me."

"You girls watch too many movies."

"What does that mean?"

"I had to watch that one three times; I'm not stupid."

"What movie is it?"

"A Walk To Remember."

"I'm impressed."

"Good."

"Although, not really, because _I_ was referring to the book. So much better than the movie. And I actually cried during that one. Not the movie crap."

"I always underestimate you, Summer."

"Yes, you do. Now leave me alone with my lovely family, oh-big-strong-jock-man."

"With pleasure. Bye."

"Bye."

She hung up the phone and laughed. She didn't know what kind of a relationship she had with Luke. Sometimes she seemed to almost be flirting with him, and she felt guilty for doing that to Marissa. Other times she didn't trust him. Like he was hiding something. But then she laughed because someone who was _that_ into water sports usually doesn't have more to hide than a purple Speedo. But she liked who Marissa was when he was around. She seemed happier. And Marissa needed happier.

Avoiding her father was getting easier and easier. He was burying himself into the papers spilled across his desk more and more often. And even when they were being the happy family, he didn't want to yell at her so she could do whatever the hell she wanted. She got a ride to school every day with Jack, the French driver her dad had 'given' her who actually wasn't that bad. And he always commented on her outfit. Her dad didn't even have time to notice.

Mondays came and went, and after a while she learned how to deal with them. Detour to the Starbucks around the corner from her school. And it was usually her shock day. She needed some way to keep people awake and remember what they had been missing all weekend.

This Monday in particular, she wore a dark red tube top that actually wasn't a tube top, for skinny strings extended around her neck. But it was so tight, it didn't need the straps. She had black jeans on and a bed head look that really gave the impression that she didn't give a damn. And eyeliner. A lot of it.

As she walked by Jack, she caught his eyes on her waist.

"Yes?"

"Miss Summer, are you sure that _this_ is the message you want to be sending all the desperate young men in your school?"

"What's wrong with my message?"

"It's a little..."

"Slutty?"

"No. Easy."

She bit her cheek and nodded.

"Don't worry about me, Jack."

"But I do, Miss Summer."

"I know. That's why I love you."

She kissed his cheek and slid into the back seat of the limo. He sighed and got into the front. She pushed the window down and leaned her head next to his.

"Give me something loud."

"Yes, Miss Summer."

He turned on the stereo to some old Guns N Roses song that littered Bar Mitzvahs and weddings across the country.

"_Take me down to the Paradise City where the grass is green and the girls are pretty. Oh, won't you please take me home_?"

She opened the sun roof and stood up letting her hair get an even better 'I don't give a damn' look. Jack drove to the Starbucks that they had gotten accustomed to, and bought her grande and his latte, no foam. They sat down on the side walk, sipping their coffee, talking about her father. It sure as hell was a Monday.

"Jack?"

"Yes, Miss Summer."

"Do you ever think about running away?"

"Me?"

"Yeah."

"I have nothing to run to."

"There has to be something. Or, I dunno, someone."

"Are you sure that we are talking about me, Miss Summer?"

"I don't know."

"Well, if there was someone, particularly a young Mr. Cohen, that you don't think you belong with, and you wish you could run away to a place where you could belong with him, would you want my advice?"

"Do I have a choice?"

"No, not really, Miss Summer. I would advise that you remember that you are thirteen and your life is your own and you shouldn't have to run away to get what you want."

"Who said I particularly liked a young Mr. Cohen?"

"Oh, you don't? I must've been mistaken as to the young gentleman you are always muttering about. But we must go, or else you will be late."

"You think you're so smart."

"Sometimes I surprise myself, Miss Summer."

He winked and went around the car to his seat. She rolled her eyes again and slipped behind him. She leaned back against the cool leather and crossed her arms. Everyone thought they knew better about what she was going through. Now, even her driver?

She grabbed her black, beaded Chanel and got out of that car as fast as she could. She got a lot of looks as she walked up the stairs that led to the main courtyard. She saw Marissa's grinning face running towards her before she could really focus on anyone else.

"Omigod, Sum, you know what happened?"

How was there any chance that she knew about something that had obviously just happened to Marissa?

"No, Coop, what?"

"My dad bought me this dress for like an early birthday present, and it's that one we saw in the window at Oscar De La Renta! (41) Omigod, it is soooo gorgeous."

The silver embroidered, chiffon cocktail dress with crystal embroidered mesh that they both had stared at, nearly drooling, but Summer had given up on, knowing it was the kind of dress that only girls like Marissa could wear. Tall, skinny, no curves in the wrong places.

"Oh my god, Coop, that is so awesome. I am so happy for you!"

"This year is going to be so kick ass. I know it."

"Yeah, sure, Coop." Summer's smile was starting to hurt her face.

"Oh, I gotta go. But I'll see you later, okay? Hey, you look hot."

"Oh. Thanks. Bye."

"Bye. Love you."

"Love you too."

Marissa bounced off and Summer ducked her head down to avoid the dilated eyes Chad Muller had sent her. She knew he was now looking at her ass, but it was better than having to look back at him.

She found her locked and dumped her bag into it, her purse scattered on the floor again. She grabbed a book and found her entire locker burying her in crap she mostly had never seen before.

"Holy..."

She tried to get up, but found a dozen books covering her legs. She had first period, dammit. Someone knelt beside her and grabbed all the books off of her and stacked them back into her locker.

"Hey, thanks."

She smiled and looked up to see that curly hair nod and walk away. She blinked a few times and stood up to watch him weave himself through the crowd unnoticed. She let her chest slightly fall as her breath seemed to leave her completely alone. But she snapped out of whatever she had gotten into and walked off to first period.

After class, Chad pulled her arm to stop her.

"Hey, Summer."

"Oh, hi."

"Look, I, uh, this might sound weird, but if you're not doing anything on, say, Saturday..."

"I'm sorry, Chad. I can't."

"Friday?"

"It's not the day that's the problem."

"Oh. Okay. Sorry. Bye."

He pushed past her and she walked off to her second class.

School ended as slowly as it had started and Summer was more than relieved to see Jack waiting for her. She ran over and he opened the door for her.

"Hey, Sum!"

She turned her head to see Marissa running up to her.

"Could you give me a ride? My dad's meeting is running late."

"Oh, yeah, sure. Jack?"

"My pleasure, Miss Cooper."

Marissa slipped into the car next to Summer and they leaned back in their seats.

"Something slow, Jack."

"Yes, Miss Summer."

He turned on 'Fast Car' by Tracy Chapman and Summer turned to Marissa.

"So, what do you want for your birthday that's not designed by Oscar de la Renta?"

"You don't have to get me anything, Sum. You know that."

"You know I'm going to get something for you anyway."

"Sum..."

"Honestly, Coop. You're turning _thirteen_. That's, like, big. You're a teenager now. And you don't want me to get you anything?"

"Well, I mean, if you _have_ to..."

She broke into giggles and Summer followed easily.

"So, for real. What do you want?"

"I don't know. I have most of the stuff I want. Clothes?"

"Yeah, Coop. For your thirteenth birthday, I'm going to get you something you have way too much of."

"You can _never_ have too many clothes."

"That's shoes, babe. There's always only a few clothes you can put on rotation. The rest is just crap."

Marissa giggled and nodded.

"I dunno. You have good taste, Sum. What do _you_ want?"

Summer considered a dozen answers. Your family. Self assurance. Someone to say no other than my driver.

"I dunno, Coop. That Oscar de la Renta dress was looking pretty damn good."

Marissa nodded knowingly. Summer grinned, a little less real this time. They drove to Marissa's house in giggles again and Summer walked her to the door.

"Hey, can you stay for dinner? We miss you around here. Even Kaitlyn."

"Yeah, right. I dunno, Coop, my dad's got this thing going..."

"Please? I'll personally call your dad and ask him."

"Coop...okay. If you can get him to let me. Yeah, that'd be cool."

"Aight."

She loved how they were all ghetto now, listening to Puff Daddy and bumping and grinding at the dances. Head bop and nod: aight.

Marissa pulled out her phone and pressed a single number. She pulled the phone to her ear and stuck Summer the thumbs up. Summer nodded. She pointed to the limo and mouthed 'going to tell Jack.' Marissa nodded back and half smiled. Yeah, they were all ghetto Katie Holmes-es.

Summer strolled over to Jack and gave her own half smile. It was better than Marissa's. She had practiced longer.

"Hey, um, Marissa's trying to figure out if I can stay here. So, ask her when she's off the phone. I'm going for a walk."

"Okay, Miss Summer."

She smiled with the other side of her mouth and walked off. She walked down the streets she had memorized when she was 'living' here, happy to see they were exactly the same. There might be a new car in the driveway, but these people didn't like change. Most were too uptight. That's probably why when they managed to notice their kids sneaking out they didn't think sex, drugs, or rock n roll could be involved. That was for the t.v. shows they watched on the WB. This was real life. It was also Newport Beach.

She stuffed her hands into the pockets of her jeans and pulled her hair out of the ponytail she had worked forever on. She played with the elastic, but stuck it around her wrist in the end, the thin band cutting into her wrist a little. It wouldn't cut into Marissa's wrist. There was nothing to cut into.

"It's been a while."

She spun around and caught the shy grin she had also memorized when she was living here. Forget the quotes.

"Yeah, I guess."

"What brings you back?"

"Marissa."

He nodded.

"What else would? You don't care about anything else here, right?"

"Kaitlyn and I will make up eventually. Then, there will be two things."

He nodded again and pushed by on his skateboard.

"Now I know you're stalking me. It's not even a Thursday."

"Suddenly, you remember what I do better than I do? And I don't do anything than visit my grandfather. Because _I_, beautiful, don't have a life."

He had slipped in the 'beautiful' apparently without noticing it himself. Summer noticed.

"I never said that."

"But we both know you thought it."

"And you know about me better than I do, right?"

"Sometimes, unfortunately for me, yes.'

"Lucky you."

"That depends on who you ask. And when you do it."

"So what _are_ you doing?"

"Visiting my dad."

"Where is your dad?"

"Work."

"What does he do?"

"Shouldn't matter to you. It doesn't roll in six figures."

"Cause that's all I care about."

"No. There is Marissa. And there is your stomach."

"What the hell?"

"You care about how your stomach looks to other people. Because you think you're..."

"You finish that sentence and I'm going to have to slap you."

He stared back at her, rolled in front of her, kicked it up, and looked even closer.

"You think you're fat. Probably because you hang around people that look like Marissa more than people that think like me."

"You think you're so smart."

"Not always."

"Only when you're around me."

"No. You usually know what to say to make me feel not smart."

"Oh yeah?"

"Mm-hmm."

"Well, lucky me."

"Sure."

"So, do you..."

"Sorry to cut you off, beautifu—wait. That probably doesn't make you feel comfortable, right? Because it's from someone like me and not someone that looks like Chad Muller."

"You don't know what you're talking about."

"All right. Fair enough. But what I wanted to say was I have to go. I'm going to be late."

"Sorry I distracted you."

"Don't be."

He slid off without flashing the grin he would've before. She sighed and put her hands on her hips. She took another peek at her waist and walked back to the Coopers' house where Marissa was grinning with the news that Summer could spend another night comparing herself to someone that looked straight out of Marie Claire. Joy.

_"Paradise City" written by Unknown, but it's not me_

_Note: This one was really easy to write, so I hope it's good for you guys too. And obviously, I lied. There's going to be another chapter in seventh grade. And yeah, sorry, I know the ages are off. I know I said earlier that Summer was thirteen, but she's actually twelve here. I messed up and counted wrong and forgot that Summer's birthday is in August. (The Model Home) So yeah, forget what I said before. One more seventh grade chapter, because I obviously couldn't _not_ have fun with Marissa's birthday party. Please leave a review and let me know what you thought, because I actually liked this one. Peace and love..._


	8. Does She Speak Eloquently?

_Note: None of it's mine. Oh, but I wanted you guys to know that in the last chapter there was a (41) next to the part where Marissa was talking about her Oscar de la Renta because it's a real dress. I was going to say it before, but I forgot. So if you go to Mr. de la Renta's website, it'll be number 41. I'm a girl so I always have fun with an extendable (even if it's make believe) credit card. All the stuff I mention's real, so I dunno, it's kinda cool. This chapter's a little choppy, but it's important. Please leave a review. Peace and love..._

Summer's damp hair fell over one shoulder as she tried to comb it out without having to go back to the towel. She had downloaded an Alanis Morrisette song and mumbled along to the words she didn't know and shouted out the chorus with everything she had.

"And I'm here to remind you, of the mess you left when you went away. It's not fair, to deny me, of the cross I bear that you gave to me. You, you, you oughta know."

She didn't know of all the heartache that had to be there in the song, but she knew what it was like to want to let go. But she didn't want to pretend to know anything about it. So she left the verses to Alanis.

"_You seem very well, things look peaceful. I'm not quite as well, I thought you should know. Did you forget about me, Mr. Duplicity? I hate to bug you in the middle of dinner. It was a slap in the face, how quickly I was replaced. Are you thinking of me when you fuck her? Cause the love that you gave that we made wasn't able, to make it enough for you to be open wide, no. And every time you speak her name, does she know how you told me you'd hold me, until you died, 'til you died? But you're still alive_."

She hummed under her breath "I'm here to remind you...of the mess you left..." Her hair was still stringy and she dropped loose strands on the ground for whoever wanted to clean them up. Someone would. She rubbed her legs against each other and even though she had just shaved them with all the carefulness in the world, there was still something to feel itchy on the other one. Being a woman was hard.

But her hair had to be dried, so against her will, she pulled out the blow dryer. She pushed it against the dark brown strands that seemed to get limper with each thrust of the dryer that felt like an oven. She had her hair highlighted with blond and a 'lovely caramel' that was starting to grow out and leave her roots the dark brown she was trying to run away from. But she didn't have time to fight it, and she had to get ready. She had thrown this goddamn party so she was going to look good for it.

She found a pair of dark blue jeans 'sandwashed' at the knees and hips. She had a tan tee shirt that had a keyhole neckline and moved up on her waist on both sides. She peeked at what had to be love handles, but remembered that she had lost five pounds. In, like, a week. And even if no one noticed, Marissa would. She always did.

Summer finally got her hair to fall flat and dry and finished her makeup with lip glosses, mascara, eye shadows, foundation, and blush from Lana, the adopted nickname fit better and better every day. She used her own eyeliner.

"_Cause the joke that you laid on the bed, that was me. And I'm not gonna fade. As soon as you close your eyes and you know it. And every time I scratch my nails down—_"

She shut it off and checked her waist and hips one more time in the full length mirror. As good as it was going to get. She closed the door to the empty house but didn't bother to lock it. Maybe someone would come in and steal her life away.

She walked down to Jack, smiled weakly, and got into the back seat. Jack jumped into the front seat and took a glance back at Summer. She didn't feel like talking. Apparently

"Miss Summer, are you all right?"

"I'm fine."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"You look beautiful."

"Thank you."

"It's Miss Cooper's thirteenth birthday?"

"Yes."

"Oh. I remember my thirteenth birthday really well."

"You're not that old."

"Like thirty five."

"It's not that old."

"All right. If you say so, Miss Summer."

She was looking out the window at the ocean that peeked through the trees.

"When does this party start?"

"About half an hour."

"Why are you going so early?"

"Just to make sure everything's okay. And that Coop is out of the house."

"I see."

He turned the wheel to the left and Summer saw the trees keep going straight.

"Uh, Jack?"

"Yes, Miss Summer."

"Aren't we supposed to keep going straight?"

"No, this is a better way."

"But we've never gone this way before to go to Coop's."

"It's good to try new things."

"Jack..."

"Trust me, Miss Summer."

He pulled into a parking lot for some office building from the back. Here, the trees seemed to come back. He stopped the engine and let the faint traces of The Red Hot Chili Peppers fade out.

"Jack..."

"Miss Summer, every single day, I listen to you. I understand that things are hard for you and you're trying to find a way to figure out who you really are. And I hope in some way I have helped you. Regardless," He put a hand up when she started to speak. "now I need you to help me."

* * *

Summer shivered as she sat on Marissa's doorstep. She kept clasping her hands together and feeling disgusted with herself so returning them to her sides. Then they went to rubbing the cement of the cool steps she usually bounded up with a grin on her face, sometimes real, sometimes less than real.

The door opened and Luke saw her back hunched over.

"Hey! What're you doing out here? You have to get..."

She turned her head around slowly and saw his eyebrows furrow. Slowly, he walked over and sat down next to her.

"What is it?"

"What? I'll be there in a minute."

"Summer..."

"I said I'll be there in a minute."

"Summer, you can tell me. I don't have anyone to tell."

"That's not true. And it's nothing."

"Come on."

She turned her head and saw him looking at her with those deep blue eyes. They seemed to sparkle with the glint of the sun going down in them. She started crying.

"Hey."

He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and let her hug him. He glanced over her shoulder at the house but hugged her anyway. Summer yanked herself away, though, and wiped her face with her fingers.

"Summer..."

"This is so stupid. I shouldn't—no, I mean, I wouldn't—yeah. Sorry about...that."

"It's okay. Are you going to tell me what's wrong?"

"Yeah. I should be inside there with Coop taking her for a walk and I'm not. And I only have, like, ten minutes."

"But Summer..."

"Thanks Luke."

She smiled weakly and stood up. She opened the door and grinned as she saw Marissa running down the stairs.

"Sum! You made it! You know, we should do something special. Manicures?"

"Um, how about we walk? I, uh, I need to talk to you."

"About what?"

"Oh. Okay. But then when we come back, the nails. First, the boy. Luke's outside though, I don't want to leave him alone. Maybe he should come."

"No! I mean, it's personal, Coop, and he'll be fine."

"Okay, I guess."

"All right. Good."

She smiled and walked out the door with her friend. Luke smiled out of the corner of his mouth.

"Where you ladies going?"

"Sum wants to go for a walk. But we'll be back soon. Sorry."

"Oh no, it's fine. I can understand. You girls need to talk."

He walked past and whispered in Summer's ear, "Talk to her." Summer brushed the hair away from her face and smiled at Marissa again. They walked down the driveway and along that path again.

"So, what is it? He ask you out or something?"

"Who?"

"Cohen."

"Oh, right. Um, no. But, uh, Jack told me..." She looked down at her jeans and shoved her hands into her back pockets.

"Yeah?"

"Oh, he, um, he told me that he thought I liked him."

"Oh. That's it? I've been telling you that forever."

"I-I know. But the thing is I don't. Like him."

"Sum..."

"No, it's true."

"Fine. So you want to go back?"

"No! Um, there's something else."

"What about?"

"Um..." Summer glanced around again. There was no chance everyone was there and Luke was ready. "Uh...it's about Jack."

"Jack? Your driver?"

"Yeah, um, this is weird."

"Go ahead, what does he have a criminal past? Driving people into the middle of nowhere and killing them?"

Marissa giggled and Summer laughed along with her. As softly as she could. Marissa looked at her with the same eyes Luke did before.

"That's not it, right?"

"No. It's not."

"Okay. So what is it?"

"Um, before I came over here—you know, it's not important."

"Summer."

Marissa's huge eyes looked at her and stared back into the mousy brown ones she had been trying to enhance that morning. Suddenly she felt like crying again.

"Did he do something that..."

"Coop. Never mind. Forget I said anything."

"But you did. Summer, did he...take advantage of you or something?"

Summer looked back up at her with that stubborn strand of hair falling from her ear again. Marissa's eyes got even bigger and she hugged her instinctively.

"Oh my god. Summer, are you—are you okay?"

Summer just stood there, Marissa almost crying into her shoulder. She was staring at something that wasn't there and trying to block out Marissa's whimpers. Why was _she_ crying?

"Summer, did you tell anyone? Like other than me? Summer?"

Marissa pulled back from her and saw the dead look in her eyes and her hands on her hips.

"Summer?"

She shook her head and rubbed her fingers against her head.

"No."

"You have to."

"No I don't."

"Yes you do. He can't keep driving you. Then, he'll think it was okay."

"He won't. He knows."

"But Summer, he should be in jail."

"He didn't fuck me."

"Okay. What did he do?"

"He just...he asked me to..."

"Touch him?"

She nodded shakily. Marissa covered her mouth and sat down on the side of the road. Summer followed her and stood in front her.

"Was that it?"

Summer shook her head.

"What else?"

"I-I, he told me to, you know, take off my-my shirt."

Marissa looked down at her feet as if she was embarrassed but slowly nodded.

"And was that it?"

"Yeah, um, see I told it wasn't that big a deal. I mean, he didn't..."

"Sexually _attack_ you? Because he did, Summer. It _is_ a big deal."

"No, Coop, it's not. I'll tell my dad to fire him because he has bad breath or something. And he'll do it. And he'll be gone. And that's it."

"But Sum..."

"That's it, Marissa."

She looked a little hurt but stood up and pushed away the tears that were doing more than threatening her eyes. She brushed Summer's hair behind her ear and hugged her again.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah."

"Really?"

"Almost."

Marissa smiled again and pushed her own hair back.

"We should be getting back. I can show you that dress."

"Okay. Let's go."

They walked back to Marissa's house; it wasn't that far considering most of the time Marissa had been sitting on the side of the road. They walked up the steps and Summer opened the door. She walked in and pulled her shoes off and Marissa walked in behind her. As cheesy as it is in the movies, everybody yelled their surprises and Marissa laughed. She looked back at Summer who was faintly smiling at her and let the laugh fade.

"You guys, this is...great. Thank you."

Luke came from the dining room and hugged her.

"You really have to give most of the credit to Summer. I mean, I don't know how to throw a party."

"You did this?"

Marissa looked back at Summer, who shrugged. She hugged her again.

"You're awesome, babe."

"You too."

Marissa smiled at her as Julie and Jimmy came downstairs.

"Happy birthday, honey."

"Thanks."

She was even smiling at her mom. But she kept looking at Summer, afraid she was going to break down or something. But she didn't. She grinned with the best of them. She would be grinning for the next three years of her life.

_"You Oughta Know" written by Alanis Morrisette_


	9. Say It's Been Swell, Sweetheart

_None of it's mine. Two more chapters after this. Leave a review; peace and love..._

* * *

_One year, six months later..._

Leaving so much hair out, Summer pulled her hair up into a high ponytail and pulled a sweatshirt over her head. She pulled a basketball out of her cupboard and fell down on her couch. She tossed the ball into the air in perfect free shots and caught it when it fell back down. She had her stereo up high and singing softly to herself.

"She's a good girl, loves her mama. Loves Jesus, and America too. She's a good girl, is crazy bout Elvis. Loves horses, and her boyfriend too. It's a long day, living in Reseda. There's a freeway, running through the yard. And I'm a bad boy, cause I don't even miss her. I'm a bad boy, for breaking her heart."

It was the best part of the song, and it was the beginning, so she aimed the remote and started it over.

"...loves her mama..." She hummed along with Tommy and threw the ball back over her head too far. She was too tired to move, so just turned the boy up a little bit more.

"All the vampires, walking through the valley. Move west down Ventura Boulevard. And all the bad boys are standing in the shadows. And the good girls are home with broken hearts. And I'm in."

The front door opened and Marissa and Luke came in, his hand on her waist like it always seemed to be.

"Hey Sum, we were going to a movie. Wanna join?"

"Um...no, I, uh, I need to do some cleaning around here. Some other time?"

"Yeah, okay. Have fun."

"I won't. But thanks. You guys have fun."

"All right. Bye, Sum."

"Bye Coop."

They walked out the same way they had come in and Summer fell back down on the couch. She had tagged along before on a Marissa/Luke make out and it hadn't been an experience she was quick to repeat. So pretending to be Michael Jordan occupied her afternoon. She stood up and stretched out her arms. She grabbed the ball, bounced it twice and looked behind her. Sure that she actually was alone, she bounced the ball to the other hand, back and forth, and jogged into the kitchen.

"Roberts comes up to the three point line, this girl's been having a hell of a season, let's see if she can top it off and get her team into the playoffs. She moves up to the foul line and shoots..." She threw the ball into a pot sitting on the stove. "And the crowd is loving Summer Roberts! She bows and blushes, but it's obvious the girl is beyond happy. This girl is loving the crowd as much as they love her."

She left the ball in the pot and grabbed another one nearby. She filled it with water and dropped it on the stove. She turned on the heat, put the top on the pot, grabbed a box of Kraft, and left the room. She fell back onto the couch and shut her eyes as Tom hummed about Mary Jane.

"There's pigeons in that market square; she's standing in her underwear..."

Summer's eyelashes started fluttering and Tom sang her to sleep.

Brrrrrrrrinnnnng. Brrrrrrrrinnnnng.

Summer patted her forehead with her palm and shook her head as she grabbed the phone from behind her head and yawned.

"Hello?"

"Summer? Oh, hey, it's, um, it's Chad. You know, Muller?"

"Oh, yeah, hey."

"Hi. So, I mean, I was wondering if you were, you know, doing anything on Friday."

"Friday? I, uh..."

"Oh. Okay. I under—"

"No, I mean, sure. I mean, I'll go out with you."

"Oh, really?"

"Yeah, um, sure. I'll see you at, like, 8?"

"Yeah, all right, great."

"Great. Okay."

"Okay, bye."

"Bye."

She hung up the phone and yawned again. She stood up and saw smoke around her head. She coughed once at the smell and followed it into the kitchen.

"Holy shi..."

The flames shot up again and she ducked. The rubber basket ball was shooting up higher and higher and seemed to take over the kitchen. She thrust her cell phone in front of her and dialed 911 as she ran her hand through her hair.

"Hi, um, is r-rubber flammable?"

A smooth, slightly British accented female voice came out.

"Certain types of..."

"Like the type in basketballs because my uh kitchen is on-on fire."

"Excuse me?"

"My freaking kitchen is on fire, get it?"

"Yes ma'am. What's your address?"

Summers sat on the sidewalk as she saw the firefighters that seemed to come directly out of a movie burst through her door and blow the fire out that seemed to get bigger by the second. Apparently whoever built her kitchen had been really stupid because so many things followed the basketball's path.

When the extremely loud blowing sound ceased, five men came out of her house and she rose to her feet.

"Hi, uh, your name's Roberts?"

"Summer. Yeah."

"Is your guardian here or close by?"

"Um, my dad's about half an hour away."

"And your mother?"

"My step mother's in Costa Rica."

"All right. Could you call your father? Get him to come home?"

"Um, I can try."

"All right. You should do that."

"Okay. Um, sir, do you know how bad it is?"

"It's not horrible. But there's a good amount of damage."

Summer pulled out her cell phone and dialed her dad's number as she ran her fingers through her hair again. She turned around and spoke quietly into her phone. After about ten seconds, she turned around and held the phone a few centimeters from her mouth.

"Around how much money do you think it would take to fix it?"

The firemen smiled at each other, but shrugged.

"Something around 25 grand if you want it to look as nice as it did."

Summer sighed and turned back around. After a lot of hurried muttering, she turned off the phone and turned back around, biting her lip.

"Thanks so much, you guys, I'm sorry you had to come out just because I was stupid."

"It's no problem."

The only brunette of the five smiled at her and she smiled back. The other guys rolled their eyes and walked away. The guy blushed slightly and grinned.

"This is going to sound really weird, but, uh, how old are you?"

"Why?"

"Because I want to ask you out."

"Sixteen."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. How old are you?"

"Twenty."

"That works."

"It does."

"So, are you going to do it?"

"I'm getting to it."

"I'll be waiting."

She smiled as she turned around and walked to her house to try to see in to the kitchen. The guy laughed behind her and tapped her on the shoulder.

"Hi. I'm Kevin."

"Summer."

"Would you like to go out with me Saturday?"

"You know what, Kevin? Why the hell not?"

"Really?"

"Yeah."

He grinned and she smiled back at him. She was lying about her age so that she could flirt with a guy six years older than her. Better than any goddamn Chad Muller.

That night, Summer stayed with the Coopers while her dad slept in a hotel. Apparently he couldn't stand the smell.

Marissa had seen it as a 'girl's night' and rented movies and bought tons of popcorn and chips and candies that they both knew would only be eaten by Summer. They had spent a whole hour singing alone to Jewel humming "Who will sa-ave your soul?" before deciding to finally watch that movie. They lay in front of the t.v. watching John Cusack lift a boom box above his head for Ione Sky.

"Oh my god. If anyone did that for me, I would totally die."

"Don't you mean Luke?"

"I mean anyone. I could hate the guy and it would kill me."

Summer giggled and Marissa followed her. They watched the rest of the movie sighing in the appropriate places and crying in the other appropriate places. After it ended, Marissa wanted to watch another movie, but Summer shook her head.

"Can we just, like, talk?"

"Oh, yeah, sure. About what happened today?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Okay. Upstairs?"

Summer nodded and followed Marissa up the staircase into Marissa's room. She turned on the light and sat on the floor. Marissa lay down on her bed with her face cradled in her arms at the foot of it.

"So you were playing basketball?"

"You make it sound so stupid."

"Isn't that what happened though?"

"Well...technically yes. But it only burnt because I was asleep."

"You fell asleep with the stove turned on?"

"I was tired."

"From all the cleaning?"

"Uh..."

"It's okay. I'm actually the one who should feel bad. I shouldn't have made you feel like a tagalong. I miss you sometimes."

"Don't feel bad. I miss you too though. But Luke is cool; I can hang out with him sometimes. I just miss _this_."

"I know. I'll try, okay? One night or day like this once a week."

"All right. It's a deal."

It would feel a lot better if she knew Marissa would keep it like that longer than a month or two.

"So, what else happened today? Anything groundbreaking?"

"Chad Muller asked me out."

"What'd you say?"

"Yeah."

"Do you like him?"

"He's not bad."

"He really likes you."

"I know."

"Tell me how that one goes."

"I will. But there was something else too."

"Oh. Tell me."

"One of the firemen putting out my kitchen asked me out too."

"Are you serious? How old was he?"

"Twenty?"

"Does he know you're only fourteen?"

"Not exactly..."

"Summer!"

"He only thinks I'm sixteen. I'm practically sixteen."

"Except for two years."

"Two years is nothing."

"Sum, he's six years older than you."

"I know. But he's so cute."

Marissa giggled.

"What does he look like?"

"Brown hair, brown eyes, really taller than me, and his lips look really soft."

"Sum!"

"What? They do."

Marissa laughed and turned over onto her back.

"I'd love to have your life."

"Really? Me? I don't have a great steady boyfriend who plays water polo."

"I know. And don't get me wrong; Luke's great. But you seem to live so much."

"It's not always so great."

"I know. I'd just like to know what it was like."

"Things are exciting for you too."

"Yeah, right. Going to movies, the mall, the park with the same guy every day."

"They are exciting. Hiding from your parents so they don't know how far you go, kissing in the movies, the mall, the park."

Summer giggled and Marissa followed her.

"Well, yeah, that is a perk."

"Things are exciting and as we get older I know they're going to get more exciting?"

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"Okay. I'll believe you only because I love you."

"I'll take it. You wanna go to bed soon?"

"Yeah, um, just one more question."

"Go ahead."

"How far have you gone with a guy?"

"What do you mean?"

"How far have you gone? Like, base-wise."

"Why do you want to know?"

"I'm interested."

"Do you mean, like, am I a virgin?"

"That too."

"Coop, you think I would sleep with a guy and not tell you?"

"No, I mean, I just want to know, you know?"

"Just, like, second I guess."

"Like, he's gone up your shirt?"

"Yeah."

"Who?"

"You'd laugh at me."

Marissa gave her a look.

"Sum, you know me better than that."

"Okay, but you can't tell anyone. You remember that guy? The one who we saw at the basketball game at the high school?"

"Which one?"

"The one playing basketball?"

"You dated a high school basketball player?"

"Just for, like, a week."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I don't know. I didn't think it was a big deal."

"Wow, Sum. That's what I'm talking about. You really live."

"Going out with some kid with really cute dimples isn't 'really living.'"

"But still. I could never do something like that."

"Yes you could."

"I dunno. Well, I'm going to sleep. You coming?"

"Yeah."

It was just a little lie. She had gone on a date with that guy, but when he had wanted to do more, she had asked him to take her home. Because he didn't seem to know her. Anything about her. He even forgot her name and called her Stephanie.

Summer curled up under Marissa's covers and tried to think of something different. Different at least from what she always dreamed of. Some tall boy resting his chin on her shoulder as his fingertips brushed her waist. His curly hair smelling like shampoo that his mother bought for him and his head being a comforting weight against her. His jacket with small flecks of dust as he held her as close to him as he could. His breath hitching every now in then as if to remind himself that this was really happening. But if she thought about it, then her dreams would remember a boy grinning as he skated past her on a black piece of wood. Calling her beautiful and yelling at her when she said she was anything but. And that drifted to a thirteen year old laughing his head off with a nine year old after she beat him at Jenga. Which hinted to a guy on the top of a Range Rover making her smile for no reason. And that led to remembering her lips upon his soft cheek that was starting to hint of a five o clock shadow. And then she fell asleep wishing to god that it had been left as more than just a goodnight kiss.

_"Free Fallin" written by Tom Petty and Jeff Lynne_


	10. Your Love Not to Grow to Cold

_None of it's mine. Sorry this one's a little shorter. And I lie so easily, two more after this one. Peace and love..._

* * *

_One year, six months later..._

"Where are you going?"

"Party."

"Where?"

"Why do _you_ want to know?"

"Because I'm your father."

Summer's hand was on the doorknob and the other was on her hip. This guy sitting on the couch with the current bestseller was trying to tell her what to do. She didn't even know the guy.

"Was. Was my father."

"Summer..."

"Sorry. Go talk to your wife."

"Summer, that's not fair."

"You know what's not fair? My own father ignoring me. I have no idea why he was, is, but suddenly deciding he actually wants to be my father. That's not fair."

"I want to be your father."

"Save your breakthrough for someone who cares."

"Why are you making this so hard?"

"Because, _Dad_, when I was thirteen, and you were banging a different blonde every night, I was the one comforting Tracy. And I was the one who actually considered asking Jimmy Cooper to adopt me."

"I wouldn't have allowed it."

"I wouldn't have cared."

"Summer, remember when I used to take you to the zoo? And take you to Britney Spears concerts?"

"That wasn't you. Granddad took me to the zoo and Mom took me to Britney Spears concerts. She knew all the words."

"Well, your mother's not here anymore. She left us. And I'm all you've got."

"Oh no, Father, I have Lana. The bitch who acts more like a fifteen year old than I do. Remember her? Although you just use her for the sex, so I guess you don't remember much except for 'Oh Neil!'"

"Summer James Roberts, you do not have the right to talk to me like that."

"After a few too many hangovers, I think I do."

She walked out of the door and slammed it behind her. Marissa's new birthday present was sitting in her driveway.

"Pretty sweet, huh?"

"Yeah, it's cute."

"You okay?"

"I'm fine."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, Coop, let's do this."

Marissa drove to Holly's house and parked outside. Summer was wearing a white boyfriend tank over a new orange bikini and a pair of white cotton shorts. She smoothed them down and ran her fingers quickly through her hair. They opened the door to the pounding bass of Nelly's "Hot in Herre." Holly came rushing to the door and hugged both of them with John attached to her ear, trying to get her top off. She giggled and pushed his chest away as she pulled it off herself. Apparently Holly had gotten her new birthday presents a few months early. Summer silently prayed to herself that it hadn't been her father that had given them to her. Holly's bathing suit was light pink and she looked like the perfect Barbie. Summer smiled at her and pointed past her toward the living room. Holly had John up against her and she nodded with her eyes closed. Marissa had gone off a while ago to find Luke and Summer stood stationary in front of the stereo. Chad had nodded her a silent hello; she knew he still liked her but he was such a...boy. Like the ones she used to baby-sit. She needed a man.

Some guy across the room was smiling at her, so after a while she smiled back. He was...very blonde. But she let him walk up to her and press so close against her that she didn't have to move anymore. He could move both of them. She saw Marissa making out with Luke on a couch and she saw Holly making out with John close to her, and she put her arms around this guy's neck to pull him in even closer. He dropped his hands to her ass and pulled her up even closer against him. She was literally breathing this guy in. His hands went up the back of her shirt and played with the ties of her bikini. She pulled off her shirt and pressed against him before he could see the roundness of her stomach.

Here was a guy she hadn't spoken a word to in her life.

The song changed to a slower one and the guy pulled her in tighter. His hands were on her lower back and hers were playing with the necklace that he had hidden beneath his shirt. He moaned against her ear and she shivered slightly against his warm breath against her cool back. She moved with him until the song ended, but when he tried to go for the next one, she pushed him away and smiled sweetly.

"I gotta go. Sorry."

"Oh, yeah, sure. What's your name, anyway?"

"Um, Summer."

"Well, Summer, I hope I'll see you again sometime."

"You can count on it."

"I will."

He winked at her and she smiled back. She walked away from him and went into the bathroom. She shut the door and fell against it. She leaned her elbows on her knees and stuck her head in her hands. She breathed in and got up to leave but realized that Marissa was the only ride she had. So instead she pulled out her cell phone and played with the ring tones, trying to ignore anything about the place where she was. She found Suzanne Vega and thought of walking down a street singing to herself and some kid rolling up beside her. But she didn't think about him anymore. She didn't have any reason to.

"My name is Luka. I live on the second floor."

She was barely whispering in Holly's bathroom. And really confused. She punched a number into her phone, sent it, and looked at the white tiles on the floor.

"Hi, um, is Neil there?"

"He just walked in. Who may I say is calling?"

"His daughter."

"One second, Miss."

Summer pushed her hair back with her fingertips again and found a can of Altoids. She popped one in her mouth as her father's voice came on the phone.

"Summer?"

"I'm sorry."

"What?"

"I'm sorry."

"This is _Summer_ Roberts, correct?"

"That's me."

"You're sorry? For what?"

"Yelling at you."

"Oh, Summer, I've gotten used to it."

"Say you accept the damn apology because I'm not saying it again."

"Um, all right. I accept it. Are you all right, sweetie?"

"Say you forgive me."

"I forgive you."

"I'm fine. Thanks, Dad."

"Sweetheart, do you want to have dinner sometime? Without Lara?"

"Uh yeah. Okay. Tomorrow night?"

"Excellent. I'll pencil you in."

She weakly laughed.

"Are you sure you're all right, honey?"

"Fine. Bye Dad."

"Bye Princess."

She hung up the phone and pushed her head against the door. Someone knocked on the door making it vibrate against her back.

"Someone's _in_ here!"

"God, sorry."

She let her legs fall flat in front of her and whispered words that her mother used to sing to her before she fell asleep. She said it was perfect, the epitome of the perfect man. And Summer would be complete if she found a guy who knew the melody.

"You say, you want, diamonds on a ring of gold. You say, you want, your story to remain untold. But all the promises we made, from the cradle to the grave. When all, I want, is you. You say, you'll give me, a highway with no one on it. A treasure just to look about it. All the riches in the night. You say, you'll give me, eyes in a world of blindness. A river in a time of dryness. A harbor in the tempest. But all the promises we break, from the cradle—"

"Summer?"

"Yeah? Just a minute."

Summer stood up and struggled with the tangles in her hair to make it neat. She smoothed out her shorts and opened the door. Holly was standing there with her eyes looking around Summer.

"Are you in here alone?"

"Um, yes."

"But I heard voices."

"Oh, I had to make a call. But I'm, I'm done."

"Okay. We should get back out there. The boys might die if the prettiest girls are alone in a bathroom together."

She winked at Summer and giggled. Summer laughed despite herself and nodded.

"That would be a travesty."

"So let's _go_. Get our _groove_ on."

Summer laughed and Holly was in hysterics. They walked out and Summer danced with at least five guys she had never seen before. Surprisingly enough, she actually had fun giggling hysterically over everything they said. And it was easy, and it made them kiss her while they pulsated to rap that should have made her nauseous. But it didn't.

Marissa gave her a hug when she dropped her off and a grin.

"That was fun."

Summer nodded.

"It was."

"You were quite the little player."

"What can I say?"

Marissa giggled and Summer found it catching as she tucked her hair behind an ear.

"So I'll see you soon?"

"Yeah, sure, that'd be good."

"All right, Sum. Love you."

"Love you too."

Marissa drove off and Summer couldn't wipe the grin off her face. This was beyond ridiculous. She was murmuring to herself in a bathroom a little more than an hour ago. Then she had fun. In a situation she wouldn't have willingly put herself in. But she had...forgotten about everything that had overcome her life before. It hadn't been so significant. And it felt good. To lose her inhibitions and be able to let go. And Co—nobody was going to make her lose sleep worrying. At least not that night.

_"Luka" written by Suzanne Vega_

_"All I Want Is You" written by the amazing Bono, The Edge, Adam Clayton, and Larry Mullen_


	11. Right Back Where We Started From

_None of it's mine. It's belongs all to Josh Schwartz, McG, and the nice people at FOX._

* * *

_Four months later..._

"My god, Coop, the show this evening is going to be so hot."

Marissa handed Summer a Diet Coke and let her sunglasses fall to the bridge of her nose.

"Just because you're in it, darling."

She giggled and Summer followed her. They both readjusted their sunglasses and leaned back in their chairs. Marissa's lawn still made the best tanning spot, no matter how tempting the beach looked. It was private and the sun was exactly the same. Marissa was sitting up and Summer tapped her back.

"Hey. What's up?"

"Nothing. I just...you know the Cohens got some guy staying in their pool house?"

"No. Is he, like, a total babe or something?"

"He's cute, but, I mean, I'm with Luke, right? So I...don't care."

"Okay, Coop."

"He's just...different, you know?"

"When'd you meet him?"

"Last night."

"A _total_ babe?"

"Look for yourself."

Summer sat up beside Marissa and stretched her neck over the fence. A guy with sandy blonde hair was floating in the Cohens' pool with some guy with dark curly hair.

"Which one is he?"

"Sum, one's Cohen, which one do you think that is?"

"Oh."

Summer furrowed her forehead and watched the blonde get out of the pool with just his arms.

"Yeah, he's cute. In that ripped bad boy kind of way."

The dark haired boy got out of the pool next to him while fumbling a little with his legs against the side.

"Are you _sure_ that's Cohen?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Just...wondering."

"Okay."

Cohen. That was a name she had forgotten since forever. Why did she have a tugging feeling that he was really important?

"I'm gonna go inside, okay, Coop? I'm totally going to burn."

"Um, okay, I'll go with you."

Marissa took another look at the blonde and walked in behind Summer. Summer plopped herself on Marissa's bed and grabbed the black dress hanging on her closet door.

"God, Coop, you're going to look _so_ gorgeous in this. It's all very...forties, you know? And your _classic_ good looks will ah-ccent the _gorgeous_ neckl-ah-ine. Don't you agree?"

Marissa laughed.

"What are you talking about?"

"Getting into character. Babe, you're going to be a hot ready-for-charity model."

"Right."

The doorbell rang downstairs and Marissa pulled a white cotton shirt over her light green cargos.

"One sec, Sum."

She jogged down the stairs and Summer held the dress up against herself. It was supposed to hit the wearer right below the knees, but it was floor length on Summer. The neckline went below Summer's boobs and the waist showed so much of her behind it. She put it back on the closet door and sat back on the bed. Her dress was pretty too. And it would fit, so she'd look fine standing next to Marissa. Forget the insecurities, Summer. You're beautiful. Remember?

She stood in front of the mirror and let her hair fall around her shoulders. She held it up into a bun with her fingers but shook it loose again. Cohen. Who _was_ that? Brown hair that seemed to rest on her shoulder, but...oh. Right. Him. The skateboarder. She hadn't dreamed about him in...over a year. Hadn't thought about him in four months. He was nobody to her. But who was that kid he was hanging out with?

Marissa walked back into the room and closed the door very slowly as if she was afraid to make a noise. Summer looked carefully at her.

"Coop? You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"Okay, well, I have to go. Are you sure you're going to be okay?"

"Yeah. Fine."

She smiled gently at Summer. Summer had given that smile before. 'See, I _am_ fine.'

"I have to get dressed. I'll see you at the show, though, right?"

"Yeah. Of course. Bye, Sum."

"Bye."

Summer hugged her tightly and smiled before leaving Marissa standing still in her bedroom.

Summer pulled her dress over her head and stood in front of the mirror. She had to not care what she looked like. Like she looked gorgeous stepping out of bed in the morning. She brushed her hair straight and tousled it just a little. She looked back in the mirror and frowned. It didn't look half as good as Marissa's Donna Karen would on her, but it was close enough. She grabbed a purse and pulled a light blue sweatshirt around her shoulders.

"Daddy, I'm leaving. Daddy?"

They had gotten closer and she had gotten accustomed to him taking her out on Sunday nights for dinner. And he said he was coming tonight.

"Daddy?"

She knocked on his office door as she walked in. A blonde was perched on her father's desk as he sat looking at her. His gaze snapped immediately to his daughter as she entered the room and he smiled.

"Summer. You look beautiful, sweetheart. Are you leaving?"

"Uh...yeah."

"Great. I'll see you there, all right? I just have to...take care of a client."

"God, Dad, can I guess what she got done?"

The blonde shot her a glare and Summer shot back an equally good one. She had to be four years older than her.

"Summer, be..."

"Leaving. I'm gone. Bye Dad."

Summer rolled her eyes and walked out of the room and started down the hall when she heard the blonde speak just like she looked. Cheerleader.

"God, Neil, what a bitch you raised for a daughter."

"She can be temperamental, Charlene, but she's not a bitch."

"She's got boarding school written all over her."

"No. Boarding school? No."

At least he made an attempt to stand up for her. Summer shook her head and walked out of the house to the limo waiting for her. Coop. Holly. Party. She was fine.

She stepped out of the limo at the same time she saw Marissa standing at the foot of the stairs with her family.

"Coop. Hey."

Marissa turned around and smiled at her. Summer walked up and did a little twirl for her when she reached her.

"You look gorgeous, Sum."

"Thanks. Hi, Mrs. Cooper. Mr. Cooper. Oh, hi Kaitlyn."

"Hi _Summer_." Some things never die.

"Oh, Summer, your dress is beautiful. And your shoes. Breathtaking."

"Um, yeah, thanks, Mrs. Cooper."

Jimmy nodded.

"Uh, yeah. You're always beautiful, Summer."

Summer let one of those half grins return to her mouth. Marissa was looking at her mom with a wounded look on her face, but turned back to Summer.

"Should we go in?"

"Yeah, Coop, let's go."

Summer and Marissa walked in front of the rest of the Coopers, giggling their way into the building that looked like a palace. They walked over to a bunch of blondes and ecstatically said their hellos.

"You do look gorgeous, Coop. If your mom..."

"Who said anything about my mom?"

"Oh nothing. H-How's Luke?"

"He's good. Made captain in soccer."

"Oh cool."

"Anyone worth mentioning for you?"

"Well there was that blonde in the pool."

She giggled and Marissa laughed a little less energetically. They glanced across the fountain and saw that kid standing awkwardly wearing a tux that seemed to hang on him. He still looked ripped.

"_Who_ is that?"

Marissa looked over to him with a wistful look in her eyes. Summer slightly shook her head. Marissa had Luke. She didn't care about hot blonde guy. And Summer didn't care about that Cohen kid standing next to hot blonde guy.

"The cousin? The pool boy? I don't know."

Marissa was laughing even worse than how she looked at him. Summer shook her head again.

"Well, I'm going to find out."

"Really? You like him?"

"I dunno, I mean, he is cute."

"Yeah, I mean, yeah. You guys would look good together."

"Really? You think?"

"Yeah, sure."

Yeah, that was Marissa giving her her blessing. She was so bad at faking it. She pulled a hand up to the back of her neck and grinned nervously.

"We should go get ready, you know?"

"Yeah. Let's go."

They walked off to the VIP door and Marissa opened the door for the two of them. Summer took another glance behind her shoulder as she saw Cohen and hot blonde guy walk out of her view. She bit her lip and walked into the room with Marissa. A woman with a very tight bun in her hair thrust a gown into her hands.

"Darling, please wear the Vera Wang. The other girl is just _not_ ready for it."

"Oh, yeah, sure."

"Fabulous."

Summer held out the dress in front of her and ran her thumb along the stripes. It was pretty. Like something Marissa would be given to wear. She held it up against her and shrugged. She slipped behind a curtain and pulled her dress over her head and the new one on. It was cute.

She pulled open the curtain and the tight bun pulled her arm over to a vanity mirror.

"Do her, Carlos."

Some French guy in very, very tight black pants flew over and swept her hair into a loose bun on the top of her head and tied it with a lock of false hair. He spun her chair around and started dusting powder on her eyelids.

"Beautiful."

She stood up and walked into her spot as Marissa walked onto the stage. She glanced around her, taking in all the blonde bombshells in their bras, when she caught two glasses and a bottle of Chardonnay. She hid them behind a chiffon scarf and ran back into her spot.

Marissa ended her speech to applause and started to walk back as Summer walked on. They kissed each other's cheek and Marissa grinned.

"Go get em, tiger."

She giggled softly and flounced down the runway. She could do this. She nodded at Luke and he nodded cockily back at her. She stood at the end of the runway and let her hand rest on her hip. People were clapping and she smiled harder. She scanned the crowd quickly, but saw Lara sitting alone with two other couples. She struck another pose and walked back up. She smiled at a girl who whispered "good job" and grabbed the bottle from behind the pink scarf. She uncorked it and drained a fourth of it down her throat without thinking it could've been anyone's. She shook her head and let it drown to her brain. She grabbed the two glasses and scanned the girls for Marissa. She was standing in the back of the room and Summer ran over to her.

"Look what I stole!"

Marissa grinned and pulled a bottle of vodka out of her purse and shook it.

"Look what _I_ stole."

She laughed and Summer laughed through an "_All_ right!" she handed Marissa a glass and they clinked them together and Summer downed it effortlessly. Holly had taught her at one of her parties in June how not to feel anything from an endless amount of alcohol. And she was just giggling because everything was so goddamn funny. Even the fact that her dad didn't...well there was the blonde at home. And even he needed some. Ew. Bad mental picture.

Marissa kissed her cheek and ran to go down the runway herself in a gorgeous light pink dress. Summer cleared the table of Marissa's makeup and sat on it herself. So what if her dad wasn't there? She could still have fun.

Marissa came back in giggles too and the girls clinked again.

"Is this thing over?"

"Yeah. You gonna head over to Holly's? You have a ride?"

"Yeah, Tamara said she'd take me. I just don't want to go alone."

Summer winked exaggeratedly and giggled as Marissa slowly nodded.

"Okay. I'll see you there."

"Bye Coop. You look gorgeous."

"You too."

The girls grabbed their bags of clothes and Marissa left to find Luke. Summer saw hot blonde guy standing by himself this time and walked over to him after brushing her hair out of her face.

"Hey. Where you going? My friend Holly, no, well her parents are letting us use their beach house, as a gift. You know, cause of all our hard work we did for charity."

She got a smile out of him.

"If you need a ride or...anything...I'm Summer."

She grinned softly and walked over to Tamara and her beyond loud friends. She saw hot blonde guy walk away to that dude with the brown hair. It was so much easier to giggle and be that valley girl that Tracy used to always accuse her of being when she was drunk.

A few seconds later, they both came running over and jumped in the car after her. Summer grinned. Coop wasn't the only one who should get what she wanted. Summer was always the one they looked at second. The first girl to walk down the runway, but not good enough to announce it all. Not that she cared.

When they got to Holly's house, Summer wrapped her arms around Holly in an already drunken hug. Marissa came walking over and they all lowered their voices to a shriek. Marissa had changed already, and her gorgeous new purse.

"Is that a new purse?"

Marissa glanced down and nodded.

"Does your dad _ever _say no?"

Summer giggled and turned to watch hot blonde guy disappear into the house. She nodded to him even though she already saw Marissa's eyes on him.

"Look who I brought."

Marissa poured more vodka into the already overfilled glass. Summer raised her eyebrows but dismissed it.

"I'm going to play him hot _and _cold." She took another look at Marissa's eyes and tapped a blonde on the shoulder. She forgot her name. "You wanna pee? I gotta pee."

When she got back, Summer had changed into her bikini and lost hot blonde guy, but made her rounds around the house she knew so well. She had been to a few too many of these parties. Nearly every person she met thrust a beer into her hand and she downed nearly all of them. That was a lot of nearlys. Across the room, she saw Coop talking to hot blonde guy again, laughing and smiling and touching his arm. She had Luke. God, some people were, like, so totally unappreciative of what they have. Summer had nothing. Holly came laughing over to her and gave her another cup of beer. Summer took a sip of it, but followed hot blonde guy out of the house.

He stayed on Holly's deck and she ran over to him.

"Look, who I found!" She reached him and stopped immediately; causing her beer to spill all over the suit he hadn't changed out of. "Oops!" She sighed dramatically. "I'm wasted."

He nodded slowly and started to wipe off his shirt. She put her hands on his chest and slowly massaged it. Helping him. She draped her arms around his neck and murmured with heavy breath.

"So what's your name, anyway?"

"Ryan."

He pulled her hands from the back of his neck, and gently moved her back. That kid with the brown hair came out, nearly as wasted as she was, his eyes wide.

"You gotta come..." His eyes fell on her and he furrowed his brow. Where had she _seen_ him before? He was mad, though, or something. And he was really staring at her.

"What are you doing?"

The hot blonde Ryan started to walk over to the kid, pushing Summer away farther.

"Hey, um..."

"Excuse me!" He had _pushed_ her away. This guy was supposed to be her Luke and he was pushing her away. The kid with the brown hair's eyes widened and he turned his gaze back to hot blonde Ryan.

"What are you _doing_? I named my boat after her."

"What? Ew! Who are you?"

Hot blonde Ryan walked farther away from her.

"It's not what you think. She's a little bit drunk."

She walked back over to him and threw her arms back around his neck, burying her face in his back.

"Come on, Ryan."

The dark haired guy started to walk off, but hot blonde Ryan stopped him with a hand on his arm. The other hand was pushing Summer off of him.

"Seth! Seth. Seth." Seth. That was his name. Seth Cohen.

Seth Cohen pushed him off of his arm and onto the wall.

"You know what? Why don't you just go back to Chino? I'm sure there's a really nice car in a parking lot that you could steal."

Marissa came out of the house with a new glass in her hand. Seth Cohen ran away from hot blonde Ryan and down to waves. Summer scoffed.

"Chino? Ew!"

Hot blonde Ryan took off into the house and Summer shook her head dismissively and shivered. Her Luke was a thief? Like, from a place where they didn't even have a P.F. Changs? Ew. Summer needed more...beer.

Marissa came running up next to her at the tap and nodded. Summer gave them both full glasses.

Summer went back through the party, and saw Luke coming in the back with his shirt half unbuttoned.

"Hey Luke!"

"Hi Summer."

"You know, you look so hot tonight."

"Yeah, thanks."

He was looking over her head gently, but she walked up to him and put her hands in the break of skin from his shirt.

"_So_ hot."

He looked down at her and she bit her lip. His hand seemed to slide down her waist and she grinned through her lip.

"Hey, uh, Summer, you wanna go for a walk or something? You look hot tonight too."

Summer looked back over her shoulder and saw Marissa gulping another beer. She sighed exasperatedly.

"God, I can't. sorry, though. Some other time. I gotta get Coop home or she'll kill herself or something. Raincheck?"

"Coop. Right. Marissa. Um, yeah. Sure. Raincheck."

He nodded and she grinned at him before stalking through the party and catching Marissa just as she started to fall.

"Whoa, Coop." She staggered a little bit back because of her weight but got her back up.

"Coop? Coo-oop? Air to Coop."

She giggled at herself, but Marissa didn't move. Holly came giggling back over and gasped at Marissa.

"What _happened_ to her?"

"I think she had too many beers," Summer whispered.

Holly's eyes widened in understanding and she nodded slowly.

"Ohhh."

"We should get her home. Tell the people to go home."

"Okay. People! Go home!"

Summer giggled and Holly followed her. Luke walked over and saw Marissa in Summer's arms.

"Is she okay?"

"Yeah, Luke. But could you get the people to go home?"

Holly looked up at Luke and he looked back. She smiled softly and he nodded.

"Hey, you guys! Party's over! Go home!"

He shut off the stereo and flashed the lights twice. The people moaned but left in scattered groups. Luke left with a grin after they were all gone and Holly smiled back. Summer started to pick Marissa up from underneath her arms, but she fell down under her.

"Oop! Holly, help me!"

"Relax, Sum. Here."

Holly grabbed Marissa under her arms and Summer picked up her feet. They stumbled with her out to Holly's car and dumped her in the back seat. Holly got behind the wheel and Summer fumbled with her seatbelt. They got to Marissa's house after only flipping off three people and ignoring all the cop cars they saw. Holly looked into the backseat and Marissa.

"Shhhhhhhh. She's sleeping."

"We need to get her out of your car."

Holly walked out of the car and opened Marissa's door. She started pulling on Marissa's arms and Summer giggled, a little more worried this time.

"Holl! Wait."

Summer undid her seatbelt and walked around the car to the side where Holly was yanking Marissa out. She slid her hands to Marissa's arms and down to her waist and started easing her out of the car.

"Are you coming onto her?"

"Yeah, I'm coming on to my drunk best friend. Who, ew, is like a girl!"

Holly giggled and helped Summer get Marissa out of the car, Summer holding her legs and Holly holding her arms. They got her over to the front porch and fell over with her onto the ground. Summer sighed.

"I can't believe her!"

Holly pulled her head onto her own lap and giggled.

"I swear to god, she is so retarded sometimes."

"Shouldn't her _boyfriend_ be doing this? He is _so_ worthless!" Summer giggled and Holly joined her.

"Shhhh!"

Summer pulled her purse off of her arm and tugged it open. She couldn't see anything besides yellow spots.

"Coop, where are your keys? How are we going to find her keys?" She looked back at the purse and shook her head. "I can't find her keys!"

Holly looked quickly around her worriedly.

"We can't wake her parents, her dad'll go ballistic!"

"I know, I know." Summer looked quickly around and then at Holly and stood up. "Bye Coop."

Holly giggled. "Call us."

Summer giggled and followed Holly back to her car. They pulled out of her driveway and Summer leaned out the window to look behind them. Ryan came out of the house next door and touched Marissa's arm. He would take care of her, right? And not, like, rape her? But he was friends with Seth Cohen, so of course he wouldn't rape her.

Holly said bye to her at her house and Summer nodded. She walked into the house and fell onto the couch. Her dad was sitting on it.

"Oh. Hi, Daddy."

"Summer? Are you..."

"Wasted? Yeah, kind of."

"Did you drive home?"

"No. Holly did."

"Is she wasted too?"

"I dunno."

"Well, you're all right. You should go to bed."

Summer's eyes shut and her breathing started to slow. She hoped hot blonde Ryan had taken care of Coop. She wouldn't want her to get in trouble with Mr. Cooper. No, that wouldn't be good. But he loved his little girl, so she'd probably be okay.

"Daddy?"

"Yes, Summer?"

"Is the mean lady gone?"

"Charlene? She's gone."

"Good. I didn't like her."

"I'm sorry."

"Daddy?"

"Yes?"

"Do you love your little girl?"

He nodded and kissed her forehead. She nodded too.

"So you wouldn't yell at me if I was drunk?"

"I think you already are drunk, honey?"

"Oh."

"Summer, I do love you. And I..."

She was starting to softly snore and he looked at her face.

"Summer? Summer?"

_Okay, so that was a little depressing. But see, she was actually in love with Seth the whole time. She just wanted Ryan because Marissa wanted Ryan. Aha, I sound like an obsessed Seth and Summer fan. And maybe I am. And poor Seth, huh? Poor adorable, gorgeous Seth. One more to go, and I can promise it will be happier. Then, after it, read the first chapter. Then, the one where Summer and Seth are talking on the car. It makes quite a contrast. Thanks for reading; this one was much longer, so good job on getting through it. Please leave a review. Peace and love..._


	12. The Sweetest Dream Will Never Do

_None of it belongs to me._

* * *

_Eight months later..._

"Am I totally insane for trying this?"

"Trust me."

"Why should I trust you when I could get my friggin leg bitten off in true Jaws form in any second?"

"Because...I'm devilishly handsome and no one can resist me?"

"Let me try."

"Okay, okay. Because I would never want your friggin leg bitten off in any form because I love your legs and would really miss them if even one disappeared."

"I'm not doing this."

"Yes you are."

With one hand around her waist, Seth led her to the middle of the ocean and sat her on the surfboard.

"What if I split my head open?"

"I'll catch you before you split your head open."

Summer shook her head vigorously and turned back around to look at her boyfriend.

"How do I get up? Because if I'm going to do this I'm not going to do half assed. Because I only want to split my head open once."

"You crouch and then push up."

"Maybe you could do it and I could watch."

"You're going to have to learn this eventually."

"Why? So I can become a professional surfer? Yeah, that's doubtful."

"Because you can't tan _all_ the time."

"Watch me."

"Just try it."

Summer grumbled and muttered under her breath something about no care for her well being.

"Hey."

He put his hand on the back of her neck and turned it to him. He kissed her on the lips twice and on each cheek.

"You're going to be fine. I swear."

"You, I can believe. The scary Steven Spielberg movie out there? Loses a lot of your credibility."

"You're going to kick so much ass at this. And if any shark comes near just growl at it. You're scarier than any stupid great white."

"Ha ha. You're so funny."

"Why thank you. I try."

She started shaking her hands and stretched her neck.

"What are you doing?"

"No idea."

"Okay. So I'm going to tell you which wave to take and you're going to stand up after it grows enough power that it's taller than me. You ready for this?"

"I'll never be ready for this."

"You were the one who didn't want to wear the wet suit."

"No. If I die, I want to die not looking like a seal."

"You still didn't have to wear something that small. Ten bucks says at least one part of it comes off. And I am not looking for some floating bikini top."

"You mean you don't like it?"

"_That_ is definitely so not the problem."

"Well if I come out of this alive, then I might let you take it off."

"I look forward to it."

"That's a _huge_ if."

"Summer, you're not going to die."

"That's what you say, Mr. I've-been-doing-this-since-I-was-thirteen."

"Trust me."

He kissed her again, deeper this time and cupped her chin through her already salty beach hair. He pulled softly on her lips and winked.

"I'm actually going to do this? We're not just going to talk about it, and then go back onto shore to the safety where there are no sharks?"

"Just water polo players. And yes. You're going to do this."

"But I..."

"Summer. Trust. Me."

"Why do you keep saying that?"

"Because you don't seem to be doing it."

"I'm on the goddamn board. That isn't enough trust? My scrumptious hot-dog-like legs are dangling off a surfboard that looks so much like a cracker it is not funny."

"You've been in the ocean before."

"First of all, that was _way_ over there. Second of all, I wasn't on a cracker-like board. It's a completely different story."

"But you still look scrumptious _way_ over there."

"Aw. You're cute. Let's talk about that more on the goddamn sand."

"Nope. You're going to do this. Let's go."

"Wait."

She grabbed his head and pulled him up against her. She kissed him hard and ran her fingers through his hair. She took one of his hands and put it on her side as one of her hands wandered down his back that was finally getting some color.

"What was that for?"

"'So kiss me hard, for this will be the last time that I let you.'"

"Um, okay, what?"

"It's a song."

"Yeah, I know. By complete sell outs to the emo category. But what does it have to do with the whole thing?"

"If I lose a leg, or an arm, or even have a bite or scratch on any part of my skin, you're never getting any ever again. Think about that before we go paddling out there to the shark infested waters."

"Let's go."

"You didn't even think."

"Because you're going. Right now."

"But Cohen..."

"Going."

He pulled the tip of the surfboard into deeper water and Summer squealed just a little bit. He turned his head to look farther into the ocean as Summer tried to talk him out of it.

"That one. You see? Right there. You're going to do that one."

"What?"

"Wait until I say, then start paddling like your legs depend on it."

"I thought you said my legs wouldn't..."

"Right...now. Fast, beautiful."

She started paddling and he watched the wave start to lift her up. She had her eyes closed, but after a few seconds, she stood up shakily with her arms out straight. She opened them and looked down at her feet and at the shore she had been dying to get to seconds before.

"Omigod, omigod, omigod, oh my god..."

She shrieked and let her arms fall to her sides and started laughing. She was a little trust fund princess without that big a trust fund and she had gotten on the first try what took people thousands of tries. Screw fucking them.

She washed into shore and turned around with the hugest grin on her face as she saw Seth swimming in. His grin was nearly as big as hers.

"See! Oh my god, you were so awesome. I told you, you weren't going to die. That was so good. What are you thinking?"

Summer kissed him in front of the whole beach and pulled away with a half smile on her face.

"This doesn't mean I'm ever skateboarding in my life."

He laughed and hugged her so her feet lifted off the ground. She giggled and kissed his cheek as he put her down.

"I'm not going to have to do that again, like, right now, right?"

"Not if you don't want to."

"I don't want to."

"Okay. Let's go find Ryan and Marissa."

"It's disgusting; they're all back together and all over each other all the time."

"Yeah, some people have no decency."

He slipped his hand farther around her waist and kissed her.

"Oh ha ha. You really are funny."

"So I've heard."

Summer saw Marissa sitting at a table with Ryan, drinking a glass of water and eating a hamburger, and she ran over and sat right on the side of their table.

"Oh my god, Coop. I, as in me, went surfing. I went in on a way and didn't kill myself at all. Oh my god!"

"So you actually got her out?"

Ryan raised his eyebrows and Summer hit his arm.

"Yes, he did. I was out there, surfing. And I kicked ass, right, Cohen?"

"Yes you did. You kicked ass." Seth nodded his head slowly and Summer smirked.

"See?"

She hit Ryan in the arm again.

"Hey! What was that for?"

"For not believing me."

"So what was the first one for?"

"For making fun of me."

"I'm sorry."

She hit him again.

"Okay, that one?"

"For lying to me."

"Okay, just stop the hitting thing."

"If you're nice."

"I'll be nice."

"You better be. Or I'll get Cohen to kick your ass. Or...oh! I'll get _Mrs._ Cohen to kick your ass."

"So now I can't kick his ass?" Seth asked.

"No offense at all, baby, but have you _seen_ those arm muscles?"

Ryan tried not to blush but Summer leaned over and pinched his cheek before he could hide it.

"And we all know that Mrs. Cohen could kick either one of your asses. Hard too. She could make you stand in a corner."

"Or she could spank you," Marissa suggested.

"I think that's your job." Seth pointed at Marissa.

"Ew. Okay, with the sharing?"

"Oh god, Sum. Just stop," Marissa laughed.

"I'm sorry I just don't need the details of...yeah. Sorry. Not interested in your twisted love life."

"Since when is it 'twisted?'" Ryan got back into the conversation.

"It's just confusing. One week you're on, the next you're crying, and the next you're all over each other. It's like, you guys, make up your minds."

"We'll try to remember that next time," Marissa said sarcastically.

"That's all I'm asking." Summer grinned.

Ryan leaned back in his chair, letting his arm fall around the back of Marissa's. Summer stood up and took Seth's hand.

"Walk with me."

He nodded and smiled quickly at Ryan and Marissa before letting her pull him away from the restaurants and back to the ocean. She crossed her arms but uncrossed them when she realized that the position deprived her of his warm hand.

"Cohen?"

"Yeah."

"How did you know?"

"Know what?"

"That we would work. All these years, and you knew. You really _are_ smarter than me."

"Believe me, Summer, I'm not."

"Yeah, okay."

"I'm not, Summer. Stop saying stuff like that. You're smart. Really smart. No matter what you think."

"I said okay."

"Okay."

He took his hand out of hers and wrapped it around her shoulder instead. She folded herself into both his arms and stood in front of him.

"You know, there is such a big possibility that you're too good for me."

"Why?"

"Because you're so good _to_ me."

"You deserve it all."

"Right. Because I've lived my entire life as a saint."

"That's not the point."

He kissed her as softly as he could and wrapped his arms around her tighter when he felt her shiver.

"Are you cold?"

"Not really. You can still hold me though."

"Oh, thank you."

He smiled and she looked up at him with eyes that were just starting to reflect the sun going down. He winked carefully and she kissed him again. She let her arms slip under his, around to his back, and swept her tongue across his teeth. He exhaled softly and let his hand wander up to the back of her neck, and over to her cheek.

"Summer."

"Hmm?"

"You shouldn't...you shouldn't say things like that about yourself."

"What?"

"Calling yourself stupid and that. Because, I mean, you're not. And it's just...if you say it enough, you'll really believe it."

"Cohen, I..."

"No, I'm serious. You're beautiful, and you're brilliant, and you're perfect just how you are. And if you can't see that, you're seriously missing out."

"Cohen, I've spent...my entire life with people who were thinner and smarter and prettier and..."

"That's a lie."

"I wasn't done."

"Sorry. It was a lie, though."

"I was saying, when you grow up around people that you think are better, I don't know, I think I have something to prove or something."

"You're perfect."

"You have to say that."

"No I don't."

He kissed her again and trailed his lips down to her shoulder.

"Seth."

He looked back up at her and she grinned.

"This is going to be good."

Slowly, he nodded and took her hand again. They walked farther along, kicking the waves as he made her laugh. Whenever he looked at her, he always really seemed to take her all in. He always had. Seth was more than any stolen goodnight kiss in the dark. Summer knew that, even when he pissed her off. If only she could really tell him how much he meant to her. She never really could have everything she wanted, could she? If it was any other guy, she'd be able to throw those words around. But this guy was different. This guy that knew how to make her feel like she was more than a spoiled rich girl. A guy to look twice at.

_Aw, and it ends full circle. I actually really liked writing this story so I hope you guys had as much fun with it as I did. Thanks for reading to all you guys that made it through all twelve chapters. All the chapter titles are lyrics from songs, usually mentioned in the chapters, so go download all those songs, very good ones. All right, so I guess this is it. A sequel is doubtful, but possible, so keep your eyes open just in case. Thanks so much for hanging in there with me and as always please leave a review. Peace and love..._


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